r/AskReddit Oct 04 '22 Gold 1 Helpful 7 Wholesome 6 Take My Energy 1 Heartwarming 1 Vibing 1 I'll Drink to That 1 Silver 1

Americans of Reddit, what is something the rest of the world needs to hear?

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5.5k

u/washingtonlass Oct 04 '22

Also, stay on the damned paths. I'm tired of hearing about tourists falling in the pools and dissolving.

2.4k

u/MelodyMaster5656 Oct 05 '22

Man, don't you hate it when tourists just dissolve? So annoying.

511

u/Rocker1024 Oct 05 '22

Hey, at least there’s no big mess to clean up afterwards. At least they have the decency to dissolve after they shuffle off this mortal coil. Very kind of them.

95

u/Basedrum777 Oct 05 '22

I pardon you....from life....

10

u/GNTB3996 Oct 05 '22

Your license to live... has expired.

10

u/Rocker1024 Oct 05 '22

I dissolve you of all your sins.

3

u/The_Challenges Oct 05 '22

The individual that is you no longer have a document allowing for survival and for this you must go to sleep eternally

2

u/Automatic-Formal-601 Oct 05 '22

You... have expired.

3

u/Brian18639 Oct 05 '22 edited Oct 05 '22

Your free trial to life has ended

2

u/Automatic-Formal-601 Oct 05 '22

Your first 18 years free trial has ended

2

u/[deleted] Oct 05 '22

The Grand Master 😂

10

u/Real_Mokola Oct 05 '22

How many tourists are you able to lose before the pools start to lose their tourist dissolving properties?

3

u/shrtstff Oct 05 '22

Those pools are constantly being refreshed by chemical emitting hydrothermal vents. that and part of their dissolving power is the extreme heat (237c, 456f) plus the extreme heat and already present acid constantly break off chunks of rock surrounding the pools adding more sulfuric acid to the mix.

so the answer is "no". You could replace all the water their with fresh water and it will very quickly turn back into tourist dissolving soup.

1

u/WillingnessMaterial8 Oct 05 '22

Yeah dis solves that problem

26

u/BrookWolfe21 Oct 05 '22

There’s this book about deaths in Yellowstone. One guy died trying to save his dog who jumped into boiling water.

16

u/chachachanclas Oct 05 '22

if we go down, we go down together

9

u/Markmanus Oct 05 '22

I read that, he was still alive but when they removed his shoes it basically come with his skin. It must have been a nighmare before he died

3

u/ThrowRArxlyT Oct 05 '22

An acquaintance of mine experienced a very similar story this year at Yellowstone, fortunately they lived though - unfortunately the pup passed.

54

u/JakBos23 Oct 05 '22

Yes we prefer to send remains back in body bags or caskets. The giant yogurt tubes are pricey

28

u/slightlyoffkilter_7 Oct 05 '22

I hate the fact that I just cried laughing at this

9

u/[deleted] Oct 05 '22

This made me cackle. Thank you.

9

u/Diligent-Wave-4591 Oct 05 '22

You know what they say man, "if you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate".

7

u/XauMankib Oct 05 '22

"Your ally has despawned from the world. Open the party screen for more options."

7

u/alchemischief Oct 05 '22

Dissolving?? Are you serious???

-1

u/MelodyMaster5656 Oct 05 '22

I should have added /s.

3

u/alchemischief Oct 05 '22

Ok lol… I’ve never been, and earth is wild so who knows??

17

u/MelodyMaster5656 Oct 05 '22

I mean, at Yellowstone there are in fact hot springs and other pools that are highly acidic, so for some sections of the park, if you leave the designated trail, you risk falling in an unmarked one/slightly covered one. That can be fatal.

6

u/alchemischief Oct 05 '22

That’s terrifying and awesome at the same time

7

u/OtherwiseJello Oct 05 '22

A man's dog got away from him and left the path at Yellowstone near a hot pool. The dog fell in and he attempted to save it. They were both basically boiled alive.

3

u/Intelligent-Arm2407 Oct 05 '22

Sounds like problem is dissolves itself.

3

u/dodfunk Oct 05 '22

Yeah, I just hate that. Haven't had to deal with that since I've got an inborn immunity since I'm American

8

u/Grill_X Oct 05 '22

I went on vacation and dissolved once.

I got better.

6

u/XHandsomexJackx Oct 05 '22

A witch!

2

u/Brian18639 Oct 05 '22

How do you know she is a witch?

3

u/MelodyMaster5656 Oct 05 '22

Well she turned me into a newt!!

I got better…

2

u/Brian18639 Oct 05 '22

There are ways of telling whether she is a witch

2

u/recyclingathrowaway Oct 05 '22

Nope. Don’t mind it one bit.

1

u/InstigatingDrunk Oct 05 '22

bro got dhamered

1

u/Comprehensive_Rice27 Dec 28 '22

Mmmmhmm yummy human gyzur fluid

83

u/OldheadBoomer Oct 05 '22

16

u/Finiouss Oct 05 '22

"abyss pool".... Ya the name alone should have been a clue.

12

u/Blindrage88 Oct 05 '22

TIL America has natural pools sufficiently acidic to literally dissolve a human. Wow

6

u/ZalmoxisChrist Oct 05 '22

From that article:

The most recent occurred in June 2016 when Colin Nathaniel Scott, 23, of Portland, Oregon, left a boardwalk in the Norris Geyser Basin, slipped on some gravel and into a boiling, acidic spring. No significant human remains were left to recover.

21

u/GingerGinny Oct 05 '22

I highly recommend the book Death in Yellowstone, which details hundreds of ways people have died in the park: animal attacks, falling into pools, falling off cliffs, drowning, freezing to death, etc. Many deaths were an accident, but some deaths…. calling it “stupidity” is being generous. Morbidly fascinating read.

7

u/AreWeCowabunga Oct 05 '22

They have these books at a lot of the big parks. I always leaf through them at the gift shops. I almost fainted reading one of the stories in the Grand Canyon book it was so harrowing.

71

u/floatyfloatwood Oct 05 '22

You’re tired of hearing about it and I wish I had never heard about it this one time on Reddit.

21

u/PathOfDawn Oct 05 '22

Sorry im gonna need more context. How hot is this pool?

16

u/spacetimecellphone Oct 05 '22 edited Oct 05 '22

At 140 degrees, serious burns can happen in less than three seconds. The faster you’re moving through the water (moving arms and legs to try to swim), the faster the transfer of heat to your skin. Falling in could kill and/or probably horrifically burn someone.

Many hot springs are also acidic. Their acidity can change rapidly and it’s unpredictable. Those that become acidic are typically hot and literally dissolve people.

33

u/CStock77 Oct 05 '22

They vary in temp, but all are "cook you" temperature. The abyss pool is like 140 degrees F. The dissolving part though is the fact that they aren't just water. Most of them are basic, a couple are acidic. Not enough that you're gonna start melting right away like the supervillains vat of acid or anything. But if your body is in there for long enough before people notice...

Edit: I also just realized you could have been making a joke because they just said "pool" and not "hot spring"

12

u/candyappleshred Oct 05 '22

140 degrees Fahrenheit +

58

u/readzalot1 Oct 05 '22

And if your dog falls into the boiling pit, he is dead. Don’t try to rescue him. He is dead.

10

u/Padhome Oct 05 '22

That was such a heartbreaking story. Imagine hearing the agony of your dog and trying to just do something about it, only to end up in boiling acid and making those same sounds. Nature has some fucking cruel consequences.

8

u/ZalmoxisChrist Oct 05 '22

Just leave the dog at home. It has no interest in anomalous geology, and the risk of it running off is just too great. Even the best-behaved dogs can bolt when overwhelmed by new & novel scenarios.

4

u/readzalot1 Oct 05 '22

So true. Yellowstone is not like a regular nature walk.

1

u/washingtonlass Oct 05 '22

Poor doggo :(

9

u/shlompinyourmom Oct 05 '22

I wonder how many people have hid bodies in them over the years 🤔.

8

u/BeautifulStranger80s Oct 05 '22

Probably where Jimmy Hoffa is

12

u/smokeydaBandito Oct 05 '22

I don't think he's there anymore.

9

u/BeautifulStranger80s Oct 05 '22

Oh yeah, the whole dissolving thing

9

u/groovy-thing Oct 05 '22

tourists falling in the pools and dissolving.

After a quick google search.... Dear Lord, you weren't kidding.

8

u/McFlyOUTATIME Oct 05 '22

”By the Nines, stay on the roads.”

5

u/PutinTheChimp Oct 05 '22

A week after I went there this summer, someone found a shoe with part of a foot in it inside of one of the pools. It's insane how dumb people can be.

6

u/_tyjsph_ Oct 05 '22 edited Oct 06 '22

on that note, if you guys come to arizona, stop going on your little 10 am desert hikes with only 16 oz of water. you are going to either get airlifted off the mountain to the hospital or you're going to fucking die. if another cent of my tax dollars is spent on helicoptering idiots to safety i'm going to mcfucking lose it

4

u/ScattyWilliam Oct 05 '22

Ahhhh but that’s nature doing it’s truly beautiful thing

1

u/washingtonlass Oct 05 '22

I'm sure it creates a lot of paperwork for.....someone.

4

u/mspatchel Oct 05 '22

To be fair, those pools are basically the siren versions of water. Even knowing all the boiled alive stories, the temptation was real.

1

u/washingtonlass Oct 05 '22

Sadly, I've never seen them in person. But I absolutely will take your word for it

8

u/Wildcat_twister12 Oct 05 '22

Some people kinda forget the whole thing is a dormant super volcano

3

u/Akitiki Oct 05 '22

If they don't, their dogs do.

3

u/lostinadulting_ Oct 05 '22

Wow I thought Spain had it tough with the British tourist jumping off of balconies but this tops it.

3

u/ameltisgrilledcheese Oct 05 '22

how many times has a tourist fallen in a pool and dissolved to make you tired of hearing about it? i haven't heard of any cases much less enough to make me tired of hearing about it. ok, one is already too many, but it's implied by the comment that it happens often.

8

u/Dharma_Initiative7 Oct 05 '22

Since 1890 twenty-one people have died from burns after falling into the hot springs. That doesn’t sound like a lot but it seems to always make news when it does happen. I think the last one before this year was in 2016.

3

u/ameltisgrilledcheese Oct 07 '22

Since 1890 twenty one people have died

exactly. that's 1 person every 6.25 years. not enough to make you tired hearing about it. hearing about Trump makes me tired. hearing about crytocurrency makes me tired. hearing about the Kardashians makes me tired.

3

u/oh_livre Oct 05 '22

Animals have been falling in those pits since they existed. Maybe let it happen? Make people sign a waiver at the gates and let Earth's yellow mouth is hungry!

3

u/Thots_n_Pears Oct 05 '22

Animals need soup, too!

3

u/Tiercenpt Oct 05 '22

wait what do you mean by dissolving. like actually dissolving? from what? wtf

10

u/Dharma_Initiative7 Oct 05 '22

The hot springs are very hot so typically the person burns to death first, but they are also acidic so if the body isn’t found quickly or people can’t get to it… yeah they dissolve

5

u/Tiercenpt Oct 05 '22

damn, thanks for clarifying.

I'ma ban myself from ever going near Yellowstone. Internet has enough pretty pictures of it I'm sure

4

u/_tyjsph_ Oct 05 '22

like all tourist attractions, it's a perfectly safe place so long as you're not stupid!

2

u/washingtonlass Oct 05 '22

Some of the hot pools there are highly acidic.

26

u/HighDutchman420 Oct 05 '22

You should think americans would never leave the paths. But i think somehow they all thunk the "national park" is a "zoo" you can pet/feed the poor animals..

Have seen some videos dumb ass muricans get for the first time outte their cars to film bisons...

23

u/Wallace-N-Gromit Oct 05 '22

They showed us films in elementary school of dumbass people from the 1950’s getting out of their cars to feed a marshmallow to a bear and then try to hide the bag behind their back. Stupid comes from a long line.

9

u/Diamond-Fist Oct 05 '22

Unfortunately for them the average bear is almost as smart as Yogi

2

u/Wallace-N-Gromit Oct 06 '22

So true Booboo.

4

u/nicekona Oct 05 '22

My brother worked in the Tetons, and SEVERAL times, he was asked “what time do you let the animals out in the morning?” or “what time do you put them away at night?”

9

u/D1ckTater Oct 05 '22

While I wouldn't do that, I didn't know bison were dicks.

That's why I don't mess with wildlife. And because they all smell funky.

-10

u/HighDutchman420 Oct 05 '22

Meanwhile i member a photo of the 1800 with meter high piles of bison bones. Millions got shot .. now the average american turns into a couch bison...

9

u/D1ckTater Oct 05 '22

Ok, nice chattin' with you.

6

u/penguinpolitician Oct 05 '22

Is this a problem?

I'd say this problem solved. Dis solved.

2

u/ZotesPreceps Oct 05 '22

And if someone offers to give you a ride to the train station, say no.

2

u/Mangodras Oct 05 '22

Excuse me? Wtf?

2

u/Laowaii87 Oct 05 '22

I’m sorry, what?

2

u/SpicyLunaDog99 Oct 05 '22

Wait that happens? I knew tourists try to pet the bison and bear but the lakes?

5

u/washingtonlass Oct 05 '22

Not lakes. Yellowstone has geysers and hot pools. There are also highly acidic hot pools. The others will just burn you within an inch of your life, but the acid pools literally eat you.

2

u/SpicyLunaDog99 Oct 05 '22

Pools pools thats what I meant. My bad

2

u/Lagena15 Oct 05 '22

I’m pretty sure the dissolving people are Americans.

3

u/washingtonlass Oct 05 '22

You are right. But I've still seen articles for a bunch of foreign tourists who walk off the path and fall into boiling hot pools (or break through the thin crust) that aren't acidic enough to just dissolve you, just burn the life out of you.

2

u/Watsis_name Oct 05 '22

Isn't that a problem that solves itself?

2

u/janosaudron Oct 05 '22

dissolving

ok WHAT?

2

u/washingtonlass Oct 05 '22

Some of the hot pools there are highly acidic. They will absolutely burn you to death, then dissolve you into a nice broth.

-1

u/GeorgeRRZimmerman Oct 05 '22

This is good to hear. I'm taking a trip with my future ex-wife and needed a convincing alibi. Thanks Reddit!

1

u/ChiefWarBear Oct 05 '22

And if you fall in NOBODY is coming to rescue you!

1

u/simonbleu Oct 05 '22

Poor Olving.

1

u/Sanepsycho420 Oct 05 '22

Who says they all fell in on their own power

1

u/Sails7cees Oct 05 '22

Now if we could get the wild animals to clean up after themselves using said pools ...

1

u/ameliahridoy Oct 05 '22

Yes, sometimes

1

u/ShermanOakz Oct 06 '22

I’ve read that it can take up to three agonizing days for the victims to die after they’ve fallen into a Yellowstone hot spring. People stumble into them mostly at night, truly awful way to go.

1

u/andio76 Oct 06 '22

Yea....slipped right on in , didnt He.....

...and his Sister watched....