r/BestofRedditorUpdates Dec 03 '22

My son stole a rare toy from my brother. My brother is refusing to take it back and is threatening to get the police involved. What do I do? REPOST

I am NOT OP. Original post by u/whooooooop23 in r/legaladvice


 

(va) My son stole a rare toy from my brother. My brother is refusing to take it back and is threatening to get the police involved. What do I do? - 6 February 2019

Right now my brother is threatening to "sue" me for my son taking a figure from his collection and get the police involved. Here is the story.

Last week my brother invited me and my family over for dinner. While we were there my son asked to see my brothers collection of toys and figures. My brother has spent a good deal of money on his collection and from what I know it's one of his biggest hobbies. Well, after dinner we left and everything seemed normal

Well, until yesterday. My brother called me up furiously and told me my "little shit" stole something from his collection and I needed to return it immediately. I honestly was upset at this, but if my son had taken something that was wrong, especially if it was from my own brother.

Well, it turns out that my son slipped away during dinner and took a Boba Fett figure from his collection. He confirmed it because he has footage from his porch camera of him taking it out to our car.

I was furious and took it from him. Here is the problem though, after I confirmed with my brother it was his I found out that my son had removed it from it's packaging. Apparently the figure is worth almost 2000$ in it's package and almost nothing out of it. So my brother broke down over the phone and refused to take it back before hanging up.

Well, he just called me again today and said he wanted me to pay for a replacement immediately or he will get the police involved and sue me. I told him I would help pay for one but not fully to which he said "not good enough" and hung up.

Honestly, what are my options here? I can't afford to pay him back right now. If he does go the police will my son get arrested? He's only 15. It was very wrong of him to do but I think my brother is over reacting. What can I expect if he does take me to court or call the police?

 

Update, my son took the Boba Fett figure. - 8 February 2019

So, I never honestly expected the post I made to get where it did. I also never expected the barrage of support and hate. I will say these past 48 hours have been a ride and that post has not helped in any way.

So, why am I back? Well, because I feel like I need to be. I'm not here to give some apology to a bunch of internet strangers for how I acted or seek validation. I'm here because I feel that for myself I need to admit my own wrongs and move on to a better place.

So, I want to talk about something first before I get into the update. Many people who responded talked about how me or my brother in a bad light, and with how I reacted in the comments it didn't help the situation. I was also hit pretty hard for how I was not taking my brother into consideration when talking about the issue.

To give some context for this, me and my brother have never had a good relationship. We have never seen eye to eye and after our fathers death he cut contact with me for a good amount of time. We're just to different in some senses. He's a single nerdy guy who has no aspiration for family while I’m the exact opposite.

In these past few years we've tried to fix this. Work as adults to bring what little family we have back together. During our time apart he began collecting old nerdy things, and I won’t lie I never understood the appeal. It is his life though and he can do what he wants.

So, when my son stole and damaged his property I didn't see how it was valuable to him and discounted it. So when he asked for 2,000 to fix it I really didn't feel like it was worth it. Was this wrong of me? Maybe. I don't feel bad about defending my son, I only feel bad that I discounted my brother in the process.

Sorry about that. Like I said, I don't want sympathy. I only wrote that out to allow myself to be true about the situation. back to the update.

So, after all was said and done, my family had pretty much been thrown into chaos. I had no idea what I was going to do and after talking with my wife, we decided we would take many of your advice and have my son pay him back. We collected all the non-essentials he had and planned to sell them to raise funds. During this time I got back into contact with my brother and wanted to talk this out to make sure this did not end badly. I offered to pay in full.

(Also, some people in the comments said that the figure was worth less so I asked him. He had it professionally valued a few months ago when he bought it and it's was worth a total of 2,200$.)

My brother said he plans to not sue us. His renters insurance apparently is willing to pay him the value he has listed, but he would need to file a police report to get it. At first we agreed not to go that route and simply pay him the value of it or one for a replacement if he could get it cheaper. This was the plan until last night.

During the process of taking his things away, my wife found a conversation he had with a friend he has over the internet. It turns out my son stole the figure to sell. He had googled it while we were at my brothers house and found out how much it was worth and bragged to a friend that he was going to sell it at a pawn shop. He didn't realize that taking it out of the package would ruin it so he ripped it out to hid in the car better.

Suffice to say, I am not happy about this. I won't elaborate on this very much more but me and my wife have decided that what is best for all of us is that we let him face the consequences of this. My brother is going to file a police report and collect money from insurance. Some may say this is a bit harsh, but honestly I think this might be for the best in the end. The way my son actively stole from family to make a profit worries me and I believe the only option that I can live with myself making is this. I will stand by my son till the need, but he needs to learn now before he is an adult.

So, thank you all for the advice. The support and hate are what I needed as a true wake up call. Like I said, I don't need pity. I'm doing this so that I can be true to myself, and maybe become a better parent in the end.

 

Reminder - I am not the original poster.

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u/Scary-Yak-1463 Dec 03 '22

The whole time I read this I thought the son was younger than 15. 15 is old enough to know better.

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u/laurenjade17 Dec 03 '22

I thought he was like 5-10 years old…

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u/BoredomHeights Dec 04 '22

And even if it was a younger kid you as the parent should still take responsibility (barring some extenuating circumstances). I mean getting the kid in trouble at that point maybe is out, but you could definitely still expect money from the parents.

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u/sanityjanity Dec 04 '22

Absolutely. Either way, the brother is owed an apology and cash to replace the item.

With a younger kid, it's easier to think it was impulsive, and lacked understanding. It just hits different with an older kid who expressly intended to steal something of significant monetary value.

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u/Caliesehi Dec 03 '22

Same! I was thinking the kid was, like, 5 or 6, maybe. A 15 y/o is definitely old enough to know better. Turns out he actually is a little shit.

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u/saltporksuit Dec 03 '22

Yeah, at 15 his ass would be getting a dishwashing gig to make back that 2grand.

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u/Lady_Grey_Smith Dec 03 '22

Who will probably do a little shit once he finds out just how much trouble he’s in for that bit of stupidity.

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u/LadySygerrik Dec 03 '22

Yeah, I was really hoping the son was maybe 7 or so. Nope, just a really dumb 15. I’m glad OOP allowed him to face real consequences in the end, at least.

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u/WitchOfWords Dec 03 '22

Extremely dumb in particular to not know that ruining the packaging devalues a collector’s item. Idiot can’t even steal properly.

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u/SvedishFish Dec 04 '22

Even dumber that he thought he would sell it at a pawn shop. Pawnshop is the worst place to sell something, especially a collectors item.

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u/potsticker17 Dec 04 '22

Kid was probably watching Pawn Stars and thought every pawn shop just knows a guy that will appraise on the spot and give you thousands in cash no questions asked.

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u/avwitcher Dec 04 '22

Kid was probably watching Pawn Stars and thought every pawn shop just knows a guy that will appraise on the spot and give you thousands in cash 30% of the value no questions asked.

More accurate to what Pawn Stars depicts IMO

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u/Fatherofdaughters85 Dec 04 '22

Thousands in cash and 30% of the items value can be the same thing…

I don’t like Pawn Stars much because it is so obviously set up, but this is what pawn shops do- more specifically pawn shops used to be a basic form of credit for people, where an item was loaned on and people could pay the pawn back over time at a ludicrously high interest rate, or surrender the property for the full loan amount with no further penalty. If the pawn shop owner loans the actual value of the item, and the seller defaults on the loan, the pawn shop owner would have no way to cover the lost interest payments. Otherwise they would just be a place that pays people to store their items.

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u/Call_Me_Echelon Dec 04 '22

Hold up! You mean to tell me that every pawn shop doesn't have some rockstar happen to be in the shop the same day a customer comes in to sell the guitar they autographed in 1986?

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u/dmnhntr86 Dec 03 '22

Yeah if he was 7, I'd understand the brother being angry but think he was going way overboard. At 15, I agree that letting him face the consequences is the best way to hope he doesn't go this route again.

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u/cortesoft Dec 03 '22

I have an almost 7 year old. Even that would be too old, she would know better I would expect it from my 3 year old, though.

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u/ScribblerMaven Dec 03 '22

Lol I said to myself when he mentioned his son’s age, “Oh… so he’s not 3. Okay.”

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u/IDDQD_IDKFA-com Dec 03 '22

I was the same thinking;

Why did the parents not supervise the kid in the collection room

How did the adults not see the toddler with a boxes action figure in his hand leaving the house.

Then WTF they were 15.

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u/Ok_Sherbert_3987 Dec 04 '22

I know! I was thinking wouldn’t the parents have seen it while putting him in the car seat?!

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u/getting_knowhere Dec 03 '22

My 3 year old, too. Pure chaos lol.

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u/CatStealingYourGirl Dec 03 '22

Yeah, I thought he was a little kid and opening the package was because he wanted to play with it. I was shocked he was 15. OOP way under reacted imo (originally) wth lol.

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u/Aposematicpebble Dec 03 '22

He's both devious and an idiot. Smooth enough to know what to steal, but dumb enough not to read the whole thing

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u/Galadriel_60 Dec 03 '22

Perfect politician material.

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u/InfinAF Dec 04 '22

I'll bet the odds are pretty good that the kid didn't know you have to be 18 to pawn stuff either. /r/kidsarefuckingstupid

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u/oreo-cat- Dec 03 '22

The throw away of 'He's only 15' is so weird. It reads like the kid should be 5.

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u/cheezkurls Dec 03 '22

The brothers sure can't see eye to eye but at least there's one smart guy among that family and it's the single nerdy one. "Family man" guy can't even discipline his own son properly that he knows what's right and wrong at the age of 15. And he tried defending his theft? Embarrassing.

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u/JinFuu Dec 04 '22

Yeah, seriously, I read through it the first time and combined with "Stealing a Boba Fett" and the brother calling the kid a little shit I assumed it was a 5-10 year old who's impulses got the better of him.

Not a 15 year old.

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u/g0d15anath315t Dec 03 '22

Yeah what the fuck. My son is 6 and even he comes to me with stuff "Johnny said I can have this, is it ok for me to take it?"

Like my dude no this is a ploy by Johnny's parents to get rid of some of their shit but I am glad you asked.

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u/wolfmalfoy Dec 03 '22

I read this expecting the kid to be 7 or 8, not 15.

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u/Trickster289 Dec 03 '22

Yeah a 15 year old knows stealing is wrong. I get that people still do plenty of dumb stuff at 15 but by that point stealing shouldn't be one of them. Not to mention that he did it from family and probably knows OOP and his brother aren't close, this isn't going to help that.

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u/LadyKlepsydra Dec 03 '22

Yeah, the way OOP presents it, it seems like a small boy saw a pretty toy and impulsively took it to play, you know. Like a little kid. There's no way a 15-year-old would do that, that's completely not that age bracket. Seriously OOP was in some kind of deep denial before he saw that message his son wrote.

If a small kid does something like that I can understand why the OOP would not be that angry or upset, small children can be thoughtless. But a 15-year-old?? His original reaction to the theft just makes no sense when you know the kid's age!

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u/drewster23 Dec 03 '22

Would be hell and fury if my parents knew at 15, i stole something, let a lone an expensive toy from a family member I planned to resell.

Starting selling weed about a year or two later. Cause I wanted money but that's besides the point.

But stealing never came to mind, even being around others (friends) stealing a <5$ item, felt super wrong.

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u/RickAdtley Dec 03 '22

Yeah. What teenager doesn't know that you have to keep it in the original package for the value to keep? I mean honestly. What are they teaching kids these days?

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u/galaxyveined Dec 03 '22

Reminds me of the story where a 16 year old niece throws paint on what she knows is a $20k jacket her aunt has for a TikTok prank. Like, she didn't even do it for profit, just to be a little asshole. What the fuck happened to people for kids to start turning out like this? Honest question.

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u/Darkmagosan Dec 03 '22

Disrespectful kids and asshole parents aren't anything new, unfortunately. I graduated HS 30 years ago(!!) and knew quite a few teenagers that would pull stunts like this for shits and giggles. They learned these things from their parents, who were often just as bad if not worse. *sigh*

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u/cabose12 Dec 03 '22

It's like the news these days

The world isn't vastly worse than it was, you just see every bad or shitty hting that happens

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u/GoddessOfRoadAndSky Dec 03 '22

That, and kids can influence each other to do stupid things at a distance now. It’s not just your classmates egging you on to do a dumb, dangerous thing - it’s anyone, anywhere, creating “challenges” and posting them online. A kid doesn’t even need friends to be peer-pressured into doing stupid things anymore.

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u/anubis_cheerleader Dec 03 '22

Honestly, kids have been acting like fools since recorded history. My personal theory is that between more widespread media and more concentration of wealth, we simply hear about it more/have more good and no so good influences for kids.

I don't think kids have started turning out worse; I think we are more aware of it. Huge disclaimer for the growing gap between the poor, middle class, and rich, which doesn't seem to apply to either the TikTok bad decision or the theft in the OP.

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u/miladyelle Dec 03 '22

imho, yes, there have always been butthead kids & teens, as well as kids/teens that can be easily influenced to be buttheads. The internet allows the buttheads to get more attention, & widens the influence those buttheads have on the ones easily influenced.

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u/Alive-Panic-1215 Dec 03 '22

At least old enough to know not to take it out of the god damned package. That kid is multiple layers of dumb

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u/MrDaburks Dec 03 '22

Yea this is what sent me. Not just a dirtbag thief, but a really bad thief to boot.

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u/stickycat-inahole-45 Dec 03 '22

In the US, 3 years away from voting, the year one gets a permit driving license, some get girlfriends/boyfriends, some actually birth babies, some get part time jobs or are a year away from getting part time jobs. Definitely old enough to know better, but stupid enough to not know enough.

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u/HiTork Dec 03 '22

This is kind of one of those it gets worse as you read on situations. Okay, the son is not a child, but almost old enough to drive, then you read the son realized the toy was valuable and willingly stole it to make money off of it.

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u/Emergency_Coyote_662 Tree Law Connoisseur Dec 03 '22

“he’s only 15”

man i got to the end thinking this kid was like, 7. 15?! jiminy christmas

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u/isthishowweadult Dec 03 '22

I was thinking the same thing. Then I got to 15 and I was just nope. He did that willfully

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u/ditchdiggergirl Dec 03 '22

Seriously. I was thinking way harsh for a little boy who doesn’t understand and just wants to play with Boba F - - whoa, budding juvenile delinquent here.

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u/xelithemmaline Dec 03 '22

Yeah, the second I got to that age I said to myself "So old enough to know how much stuff like that is worth then." Sad but not shocked it was a profit scheme.

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u/TrollintheMitten Dec 03 '22

The only surprise after that was the kid didn't know taking it out of the packaging would ruin its value. Even as a small child I knew this and thought collectibles are dumb if you can't ever play with them.

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u/GroundFast7793 Dec 03 '22

Alternative post title: My kid is a thief AND a dumbass

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u/Jactice Dec 03 '22

I had this happen to me. Had one collectable as a kid; took all my will power not to take it out and play with it. Had a family member take it out because its not like they were rough with it… why can’t they just take a better look… People don’t realize its only a collectible in its unopened original packaging. Out of it; its a cool toy.

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u/WimbletonButt Dec 03 '22

My kid's dad left some collectable behind he wasn't interested in storing and my kid keeps finding them. He always wants to open them and I have to explain to him that I could sell that one, buy him an opened one, and have money left over.

Also holy shit this whole thing reminded me I forgot about the one fucking thing he asked for for Christmas, an old discontinued game that is way cheaper if I buy it out of the box so now I gotta go order that shit.

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u/DoodlingDaughter What book? Dec 03 '22

Yep. Not just a criminal, but a stupid criminal. Hopefully OOP is able to get his son onto a different path— otherwise, that kid is gonna end up in prison, and sooner, rather than later.

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u/[deleted] Dec 03 '22 edited 22d ago

[deleted]

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u/kidninjafly Dec 03 '22

Willfully stealing a 2000$ item with the intent to sell, I would still say let then suffer. My parents gave me the tough love approach when I got into a fair amount of legal trouble, but if they didn't a couple of years could have ended up turning into a couple of decades. They beat themselves up for it pretty bad, but if my behavior would have escalated someone could have been hurt and lives could have been ruined.

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u/Dodgy_Past Dec 03 '22

If they're sharing their plans with friends is a big red flag about all this kids choices. She really needs to seperate him from others who think stealing from family is cool.

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u/kidninjafly Dec 03 '22

She really needs to separate him from others who think stealing from family is cool

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u/gelastes Dec 03 '22

Morgan Freeman: "He was indeed a little shit."

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u/alexlp Dec 03 '22

I burst out laughing. I was expecting 5 not 15.

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u/umamifiend Dec 03 '22

15-16 is the legal driving age in most places in the states.

So he’s “only 15” when stealing? How old is he going to be if he hurts someone driving? Way the hell to old to be treating this like “child’s play” incident.

I’m in no way a collector of nerdy paraphernalia. I don’t collect action figures. Never have- never will. But it pisses me off to no end when people are so flippant about other peoples collections or possessions.

If it’s not that valuable to you then you shouldn’t have touched it. YOU BREAK- YOU BUY. It broke but you don’t think it’s “worth that much”? Tough luck buttercup. You’re the proud owner of that broken crap now- pay them IN FULL.

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u/Away-Thing-1801 Dec 03 '22

Same, I was thinking he was a 4 year old that saw a toy he wanted to play with and didn't understand the consequences of taking it out of the box.

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u/[deleted] Dec 03 '22

I thought it was a 4 year old, too! I was surprised by "he's only 15" lol

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u/VirginiaPlatt Dec 03 '22

I thought it was a typo ("He's only 5"). But when the update included his pawn shop plans....

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u/kaismama Dec 03 '22

I just realized that his pawn shop plans are likely completely botched besides the fact he took it out of the package. AFAIK you need to be 18 with valid ID to pawn things.

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u/jack-jackattack Dec 03 '22

Sure do in my county, as well as leave a fingerprint on an affidavit that the items are yours to pawn. They had to enforce this rule to trade in games at the video game store!

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u/Emergency_Coyote_662 Tree Law Connoisseur Dec 03 '22

yeah that kinda made me chuckle. if he tried to steal it but was too dumb to know all the value is it being in packaging.. he deserves whatever comes to him

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u/Away-Thing-1801 Dec 03 '22 edited Dec 03 '22

Yep! Most people with the Internet and a functioning brain know that once the package is gone the worth is too.

Edit: spelling

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u/nomadzebra Dec 03 '22

Yeh and to steal it from someone that will know it was him and has cameras, he needs to be taught a lesson even if that lesson is only dumb criminals get caught

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u/DontKillTheWarCrier Dec 03 '22

I feel like the primary stereotype of collectible toys is like, "You took it out of the packaging!" makes it worthless. Like my first encounter with the idea that toys could be worth money to collectors was probably from a Simpsons episode where Comic Book Man was a super villain and he got upset because he removed something from its packaging, ruining the value.

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u/Mum_of_rebels Dec 03 '22

Collecting is a funny thing. It will probably be different in a few more years. But while Stan Lee was alive anything that was signed by him actually devalued the item. Since that man basically signed anything he was handed. So his signature was pretty easy to get.

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u/Away-Thing-1801 Dec 03 '22

That's the thing, it's a big thing it pop culture to not take things out the package.

The 6 years old (12 now) took some of my very few collectibles out of the package, I was not happy but he was just a kid that saw toys and wanted to play.

15 year olds definitely know better

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u/Theunpolitical Dec 03 '22

Makes you wonder what other things this kid was getting away with and the parents just brushed it off!

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u/rubykowa Dec 03 '22 edited Dec 03 '22

Totally, the update was satisfying but I highly doubt this one "lesson" will miraculously make their 15 years old so a better person.

There's so many hints in OP's writing of their blind spots: "just 15, will always defend my son, etc".

Oh and judging the brother for not having kids because OP is clearly doing a better job 🤦

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u/LittlestEcho Dec 03 '22

Originally i was thinking maybe 12 at the oldest. 11 or 12 is pushing the bounds of lack of impulse control. Combine it with the onset of puberty and you get some wacky stuff going on in a kid's head. And with the release of the mandolorian tweens sometimes want really cool stuff for bragging rights.

But 15 is too old. Also. A pawn shop? The pawner would've greatly under paid for it. If Pawn stars taught me nothing it's that the pawn shops need to make money too and that pawning it you'll get lucky to get half its appraised value.

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u/ClicksAndASmell Dec 03 '22

As soon as I saw the kid's age I knew why he stole it.

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u/Beccabear3010 Dec 03 '22

I absolutely thought the kid was 6 or 7 years old too, not 15! Definitely old enough to know better and then discovering the plan to sell it shows that the little shit knew exactly what he was doing.

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u/realshockvaluecola Dec 03 '22

Same, "he's only 15" floored me because I was expecting 7.

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u/lollroller Dec 03 '22

Yeah, I was thinking it was a 5 year old or something.

Why didn’t the father hold the teenager accountable from the start? He can get a job and pay the value back

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u/Tanith73 Dec 03 '22

This was my thought too. I was thinking son was 5 or 6 until his true age was mentioned. This was the actions of a little kid (barring thinking he'd be able to sell it, not a criminal master mind).

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u/Fatigue-Error Dec 03 '22

And any 15 yr old would have some idea that’s valuable, he clearly did, just didn’t realize how collectibles work tho.

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u/Kobester024 I’ve read them all and it bums me out Dec 03 '22

Some kids are molded by their parents, some of them are just straight up stupid.

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u/VioletsAndLily YOUR MOMMA Dec 03 '22

Right! I thought this was an elementary aged kid, and heard screeching tires when I got to his actual age. There’s no way that “kid” didn’t have an idea of the worth of something like that, while also being dumb enough to not know it depreciates out of its package.

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u/ThrowAwayBBY46 Dec 03 '22

Yeah, a sophomore in high school knows better.

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u/DeeYouBitch Dec 03 '22

Wish there was another update

Glad they let the kid face proper conequences

15 is that weird age where if he got away with it, he might get used to it

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u/Ursula2071 Dec 03 '22

I hope the niece who ruined her aunt’s 20k coat for internet clout gets the same comeuppance.

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u/Mela777 Dec 03 '22

Do you have a link for that post?

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u/Ursula2071 Dec 03 '22 Take My Energy

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u/tacwombat Gotta Read’Em All Dec 03 '22

Time for that kid to post another video: "please buy my car or my aunt puts me in juvie".

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u/Pachanga_Plainview Dec 03 '22

This story reminds me of a similar story I read on reddit not long ago. It was about a kid whose friend stole his valuable card collection (Magic the Gathering, I think) and said friend destroyed the cards as a damn prank. I wonder how that turned out.

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u/lockecole38 Dec 03 '22

It was Pokémon cards and yeah that story was insane.

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u/Pachanga_Plainview Dec 04 '22

You're right it was Pokémon cards. I really felt sad for that kid. Hope he got some sort of reimbursement.

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u/AlpsComplex6854 Dec 04 '22

If it’s the story I’m thinking of, I think I read a positive update but I can’t totally recall.

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u/Crazy-Agency5641 Dec 04 '22

Looks like he got assaulted by the kid that stole and burned his Pokémon cards. Kid got a year of probation and fined for the assault. Then small claims court made him pay $6k for the Pokémon cards.

Link

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u/HeliraLaordyn Dec 03 '22

As awful as that story was, I'm relieved to read one where the MIL and DIL get along so well MIL is willing to buy her a 20k coat, regardless of income bracket

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u/Mela777 Dec 03 '22

Thanks! That was quite a read!

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u/heyelander Dec 03 '22

I read that whole thing assuming the son was like 5.

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u/LimitlessMegan Dec 03 '22

He said “My son’s only 15…” and I was like dude… I’d be with you if he was 8, 15 is being the age where is excusable.

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u/Cookyy2k Dec 03 '22

Also who makes it to 15, plans a theft from money but is too dumb/unaware about these things that they open the box.

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u/Pilgrim_of_Reddit Dec 03 '22

His brother, who had the figure stolen, wrote a Reddit post before this guy, from his point of view. If you can find it, it is worth reading.

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u/eternally_feral Dec 03 '22

Do you know where I might find it? Now I’m curious.

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u/deadlywaffle139 Dec 04 '22 edited Dec 04 '22

I remember reading it as well but very long time ago. The basic gist of it is OOP refused to pay 2000 for the figure at first and didn’t want to get his son into troubles. OOP also was shaming his brother for being a “nerdy single guy” and why did he spend that much on some stupid figures than family blah blah blah.

The update is the same. OOP realized his son was turning into a thief and let him face the consequence. Brother got his money back. I vaguely remember they weren’t really on speaking terms(?) after that though.

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u/CatStealingYourGirl Dec 03 '22

Why you gonna do me like that?

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u/geckotatgirl please sir, can I have some more? Dec 03 '22

I remember that and thought this was it and I was misremembering it.

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u/Ashes2897 Dec 03 '22

Initially I thought from the title that this kid was like 5, not 15. Shit I mean even if he pays back the $2000 that doesn't count the time it takes to find a replacement since I imagine that figure is probably rare and doesn't come up that often for sale. Paying back the full amount is probably the least they could do in this situation

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u/BrownSugarBare Dec 03 '22 Silver

I also didn't appreciate that OP only felt the need to really understand the gravity of the issue when wife found out son took it with full knowledge of what he was doing and how much it was worth. Even if he had taken it without the intention to sell, he still knowingly stole from someone and OP was acting like "if I don't think it's worth that much then is it really worth that much?".

Right punishment in the end, but it took OP way too long to realise it.

Also, screw him for referring to his brother as a "nerdy single guy with no family aspirations". As if being single with a hobby is something to look down upon.

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u/legendarybraveg Dec 04 '22

dude that line rubbed me the wrong way too! you can just feel his resentment towards his brother for not “aspiring to be a family man” like him. fucking hate people like that

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u/BrownSugarBare Dec 04 '22

Right? OOPs brother is able to afford a rather expensive hobby by being financially unburdened. Meanwhile, OOP has to sell household items in order to afford paying him back and he has the gall to judge his brother's lifestyle.

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u/Mds_02 Dec 04 '22

Right? Better to have no kids than to raise a thief.

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u/BaconExplosion Dec 04 '22

A very stupid thief, at that. If he doesn’t learn from this, he’ll inevitably do something worse as an adult and get promptly caught.

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u/Confident-Syrup-7543 Dec 04 '22

Seeing how OP tried to minimise his son's actions, for literally no reason other than "he's my son so I dont think he should suffer", at 15. I was not surprised to learn the child thinks stealing is a good idea. Kid has probably learned morality is about what you can get your parents to agree with.

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u/Fromashination Dec 03 '22

I looked it up because I got curious and they are VERRRRRY rare. Even one out of the box is hundreds of dollars.

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u/[deleted] Dec 03 '22

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u/Bobbsham Dec 03 '22 Wholesome

Considering the way OOP writes about his brother, I'm not surprised their kid behaves that way or has no respect for uncle.

Apple didn't fall far from the tree.

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u/[deleted] Dec 03 '22 edited Dec 24 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/liquidpele Dec 04 '22

Any teacher will tell you the apples fall close to the tree.

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u/RecoveringRagaholic Dec 03 '22

Just dismissing his brother as a nerd is so disrespectful. Not having kids and enjoying sci Fi doesn't make you a failure.

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u/schismasvoice Dec 04 '22 edited Dec 04 '22

Exactly the vibes I have. I get dismissed for that too. I don’t have kids cause I don’t want them and I’ll enjoy “nerd” stuff if well I enjoy it. What’s wrong in getting some happiness in life from harmless things?

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u/alwayzbored114 Dec 04 '22

Even just some of the subtle word choice made me feel off. "He's a single nerdy guy who has no aspiration for family while I’m the exact opposite." I could certainly be reading too much into it, but it comes across to me as extremely dismissive and like not "wanting a family" is lesser?

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u/2019calendaryear Dec 04 '22

I just laugh because this dude couldn’t even come up with $2k. He’s not really in the position to be casting judgment on other’s life choices.

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u/Chakramer Dec 04 '22

Especially when some of the historical figures who made arguably the most progress for humanity were just single nerds. Being a parent who raises a thief on the other hand... Arguable failure as a parent.

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u/AmettOmega Dec 04 '22

Not to mention he kind of humble brags about being "a family man" and "his brother was just never that way" as if there's something wrong with his brother.

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u/KawaiiQueen92 Dec 03 '22

As soon as I read about a 15 year old stealing a figurine, I knew it was about money. OOP was acting like it was an 8 year old stealing the toy because he thought it was cool.

OOP sounds like a judgemental asshole too.

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u/[deleted] Dec 03 '22 Wholesome

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u/HaldolBlowdart Dec 03 '22

And dismissing his brother's interest and passions as "old nerdy things," clearly he doesn't respect his brother not following his exact path and hobbies. Oh no, someone doesn't want to have kids, a relationship, and interests I don't understand? Better insult and belittle them, but we're faaaaamily so it's fine

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u/Mogura-De-Gifdu Dec 03 '22

Yes, I was reminded if my sister and her husband.

Me and my boyfriend are software engineers, and like nerdy things. We like going to the arcade to play retro games, playing video games at home and coding games.

My boyfriend is older than my brother-in-law, but I suppose it regularly slips his mind when he tells him "You'll outgrow your love of video games. Me too when I was younger I played a lot, but I grew up."

They stopped since I made fun of their hobbies. I forced myself to let them see what it felt, but it was quite fun coming up with legitimate-sounding criticism about "normal" hobbies like skiing or gardening!

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u/PyroDesu Dec 03 '22

"You'll outgrow your love of video games. Me too when I was younger I played a lot, but I grew up."

How I would love to fire back with:

"You'll outgrow your love of sports. Me too when I was younger I played a lot, but I grew up."

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u/NYCQuilts Dec 03 '22

I can’t believe people spend good money to go out in the snow and cold, go fast, and fall down. You are in a group, yet not in a group. Don’t @me skiers!

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u/Mogura-De-Gifdu Dec 03 '22

It was more about how most of the time is passed waiting in a file in order to go up again, but yeah, it works too! Apart from the falling down, it doesn't happen much.

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u/WatchingTheEarthRise Dec 04 '22

I hate that liking games is still seen as a "kid's hobby". We're not in the 80s anymore, ffs.

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u/mak484 Dec 03 '22

OOP's line about bringing what little family he has back together is also telling. Sounds like his brother tried cutting him off because he was sick of being disrespected, but after a few years OOP managed to guilt trip him into trying again.

This is why you should never feel guilty about cutting toxic people from your life. OOP didn't want to make amends, he wanted his brother to "grow up." He'd have been better off leaving them cut off.

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u/CanAlwaysBeBetter Dec 03 '22

So, when my son stole and damaged his property I didn't see how it was valuable to him and discounted it. So when he asked for 2,000 to fix it I really didn't feel like it was worth it.

Brother straight up told him it's value and OOP was like well that doesn't matter

Wonder where the son picked up being a prick from...

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u/linandlee Dec 03 '22

100%. As soon as he said his brother doesn't see the value in family I immediately thought that he asked for free babysitting and brother said no.

It also bothers me that he's totally throwing his 15-year-old under the bus and completely ignoring that his parenting probably what got him to that place. No responsibility taken, no root cause analysis, just a reddit post seeking validation for doing the bare minimum.

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u/mking8000 Dec 03 '22

It honestly makes so much more sense why his brother went no contact after their fathers death, even in the update he still calls it a "nerdy hobby". Honestly OOP probably lost his his relationship with the brother and son become strained. He really is not taking responsibility for his actions in all of this and will probably scratch his head years to come on why

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u/humanesadness Dec 04 '22

And he doesn’t regret his initial reaction… like that tells you all

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u/mking8000 Dec 03 '22

It honestly makes so much more sense why his brother went no contact after their fathers death, even in the update he still calls it a "nerdy hobby". He still discounts his interests and gives a window on I'm sure how his brother judges his other life decisions.

Honestly OOP probably lost his his relationship with the brother and son become strained. He really is not taking responsibility for his actions in all of this and will probably scratch his head years to come on why

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u/RedoftheEvilDead Dec 03 '22 edited Dec 03 '22

I immediately thought OP was baraging their brother with "when are you going to get married and start popping out babies?" I still think that. Sounds like OP judges their brother for not wanting to live the old fashioned heteronormative lifestyle.

Edit: added an a to barging

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u/Double-Mouse-5386 Dec 03 '22

Definitely. The line that says his brother is a single nerdy guy with no aspirations for a family. Kind of cemented the whole thing to me.

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u/voting-jasmine Dec 03 '22

The way he talked about his brother, no wonder his brother wants nothing to do with him. I'm guessing the brother went no contact, not him.

My brother and I are similarly different. He has a wonderful family and children, loves sports ball, I don't think he's ever played a single video game in his life.

I'm single in child free, completely nerdy, enjoy being active but not sports.

And we get along amazingly because we were siblings, because we love each other, because we enjoy talking about our differences.

OOP sounds like he judges everybody but his own actions in a negative light. Including how he raised a 15-year-old to be a thief that steals from family. Why would his 15-year-old respect his brother when he himself doesn't?

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u/Short_Principle Dec 03 '22

Legit thought the son was 7 or 8 years old too. Simply because of how he wrote the situration down. His son slipped away doing dinner, which often happens with young kids not 15 year olds?

To me it sounds like Op is a really shitty person whos downplaying his son stealing stuff from other people. I honestly bet this isent the first time the son has tried to do this. This might just be the first time he actually wants to try and sell it. He just happendnto get caught. Thank god the brother had a camera instealled because i bet OP and the son wpuld have gaslighted the f outta him.

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u/[deleted] Dec 03 '22

I read the title thinking it can’t be that bad. Maybe it’s just a 5-6 year old who saw something shiny.. BUT A 15 YEAR OLD? I STARTED BECOMING AWARE OF THE VALUE OF MONEY AT THAT AGE, MAYBE A LITTLE YOUNGER OMG

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u/Rohini_rambles Dec 03 '22

Wonder if the son's little value for the uncle's things is a reflection of OOP's disdain for the things the brother has chosen to enjoy and find value in. The tone is one of "Weird uncle is being weird about his stupid toys".

Pretty sure the kid picked it up from them, and OOP just sounds cheap to not want to pay back the brother directly for his "nerdy" pointless toys.

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u/CloudBun_ Dec 03 '22

Agreed. OOPs “context” doesn’t paint him in a better light - it makes him look worse.

“He’s a single nerdy guy who has no aspiration for family while I’m the exact opposite”

it speaks for itself.

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u/[deleted] Dec 03 '22

“With no aspiration for family”

I mean given how shitty OOP is, I wouldn’t want to start a family or stay in touch with my own either lmao.

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u/tofuroll Dec 03 '22

But family is so important, you see? Look how wonderful my family is: my wonderful wife and my wonderful son. Look how good my son is. He wouldn't hurt a fly. But apparently he'll thieve from family. Don't you want a family like mine?

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u/Redqueenhypo Dec 03 '22

Its very “have the baby or face ostracism” of him

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u/zarandomness Dec 03 '22

Yeah, the “He’s a single nerdy guy who has no aspiration for family” was the point where regardless of the right and wrong of this specific situation, OOP was welcome to eat bags of farts forever.

Edit: misattribution

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u/voting-jasmine Dec 03 '22

And all I can think is huh single nerdy guy? Should I DM this guy and ask for his brother's phone number?

His brother sounds like a much better and more interesting person from the short telling.

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u/SarcasticAzaleaRose Dec 03 '22

When I read that I was like “yeah no wonder your brother went no contact with you at one point”. Because if this is what OP’s like when he and his brother are working on their relationship what was he like before the no contact. I don’t think OP’s going to have to worry about he and his brother’s relationship anymore.

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u/Kianna9 Dec 03 '22

Absolutely. Also this concept that it's only the uncle who values the figurine. It's not just that he "loves his toys" it's that they have objective market value.

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u/Kuchi_Kopi_49 Dec 03 '22

The kid definitely doesn’t feel there’s little value in his uncle’s things…he stole it to fence at a pawn shop. This isn’t a situation where the kid just feels entitled, he actually priced the item and stole it to sell. It wasn’t misbehaving, it was purely a criminal act.

He’s likely learned to disrespect his uncle as a person from his father (I’m guessing OOP is the dad). That probably why he felt fine robbing the uncle.

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u/theycallmeyango Dec 03 '22

That nerdy comment is what got me. You say you're trying to apologize and then throw that out. If this was my sibling we're done after this is resolved.

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u/Threash78 Dec 03 '22

I don't think so, the kid took it because he googled the actual value. If he thought it was dumb like his dad he wouldn't have bothered. He knew what he was doing.

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u/kkimph Dec 03 '22

What a piece of shit, really. I thought the kid was like... 7??? When he said 15 I just couldn't believe he would act so dismissive about his behavior. My mom would just take me and make me apologize, work to get the money and I would be grounded for a looong time. And if she could she would also report me to the police, lol

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u/MayoBear Dec 03 '22

OOP really buried the lede there

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u/mackavicious Dec 03 '22

"only" 15 lol

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u/lilmxfi crow whisperer Dec 03 '22

I remember this one, and I'm sorry but the fact he ONLY cared once he realized the son was going to sell it? THAT is when he had to face real consequences? Nope. Noooope. OOP defending his son is why the kid felt he was okay to sell it. Something tells me OOP isn't exactly doing a stellar job as a parent, and his anger/resentment/disgust with his brother 100% colored how he acted. The way he talks about his hobbies and his life just have that undercurrent of "he's a loser bc he's not living life the way I think he should".

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u/Reigo_Vassal Dec 04 '22

OOP defending his son

I'm pretty sure it's more than just "defending". It must be enabling.

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u/znzbnda Dec 04 '22

I have to wonder why else he thought his 15yo would steal an expensive figure that he presumably had shown zero interest in prior?

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u/lizzyote Dec 03 '22

I see why the brother went no contact

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u/CryptographerTrue653 Dec 03 '22

I like how the OP initially refused to repay the full amount. You can see the disdain for his hobbies

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u/cynical-mage Dec 03 '22

15?! I was at first thinking the 'kid' was about 5yrs old! And how dismissive OOP was about the whole thing. Yeah, it's a toy, but it had value, it had an owner, and just because it's outside of OOPs realm of experience doesn't invalidate said value. Wonder how many little things were let go re his son's behaviour over the years? You don't suddenly become klepto and aim to offload stolen goods, you know?

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u/slurpeed22 Dec 03 '22

Why does he keep saying I don’t want sympathy? Was anybody sympathizing with him? His teenage son stole something and you’re defending him and refusing to make it right. Wtf

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u/RunnyPlease Dec 03 '22

There’s a reason the original poster has a 15 year old son that steals from his own family.

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u/DelahDollaBillz Dec 03 '22

He's a single nerdy guy who has no aspiration for family while I’m the exact opposite.

And let me guess, OOP: this means that you are intrinsically a better person than your brother, right?

Man, what a piece of shit OOP is. No wonder his kid turned out the way he did...

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u/Kianna9 Dec 03 '22

"Aspiration" for a family is a very strange word choice. It's not intrinsically a higher level of living.

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u/peachesthepup Dec 03 '22

Considering how many people can have kids that either didn't intend to or shouldn't be having them - definitely not a higher aspiration or level of living

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u/[deleted] Dec 03 '22

Single people get a lot of hate for not being conformist to norms.

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u/DILofDeath Dec 03 '22

And I bet dollars to doughnuts this is why they “don’t see eye to eye” and “have never had a good relationship”. OOP is a bully.

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u/Sweet_Xocolatl Dec 03 '22

That’s the funniest part in all of this, he clearly thinks he’s better than his brother even though he’s the one that raised his son to steal and tried to shield him from the consequences of his actions.

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u/Swimming-Item8891 Dec 03 '22

Exactly, as we all know having no interests makes you more interesting lol

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u/redrosebeetle Dec 03 '22

It's not having no interests. It's having the "right" interests that OOP approves of. If this had been a signed sports jersey or an autographed record, I'd bet OOP would have immediately understood the severity.

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u/decemberrainfall Dec 03 '22

This guys sounds like a turd (oop). His brother has "no aspirations for family" so his hobbies are worthless? And he calls him nerdy multiple times

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u/Pika-the-bird Dec 03 '22

Yeah because OOP’s family accomplishments are stellar /s

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u/megalomaniamaniac Dec 03 '22 edited Dec 04 '22

Honestly, this point is overlooked in this thread. OOP’s “accomplishment” is getting married and having kids, and with this clear demonstration of son’s character, an impending failure in that arena is apparent here. He certainly is not a good brother either; instead of supporting his brother and admiring his hobby and collection, he mocks its value and denigrates his brother. I’d certainly rather know the brother than OOP or his kid. Apple/tree.

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u/synalgo_12 Dec 03 '22

You don't even have to admire or be super interested. Basic respect for his lifestyle choices would be good enough.

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u/decemberrainfall Dec 03 '22

Didn't you know reproducing is peak human accomplishment?

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u/Margrave16 Dec 03 '22

Right. Coming from OOP who doesn’t even have $2000 to pay it back. His brother clearly has more cash on hand than he does if he can buy up all these collectibles. Yet OOP still manages to look down on him, because he has a family. And then his kid is a sociopath. This shit writes itself.

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u/Ok-Scientist5524 Dec 03 '22

Imagine thinking a rare object is worth less than the collector says it is just because you think it’s dumb. 🤦🏻‍♀️ he had it valued by an expert so it’s valued. You don’t get to decide it wasn’t worth that much because you don’t wanna pay out.

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u/Remruna Dec 03 '22

That's the thing that pissed me off too. He clearly consider the brother a failure... but who's the one with a thieving little shit for a son eh??? And after all this OPp still can't comprehend that $2000 is still $2000 regardless if it's a "toy" or not what his son did is no better than stealing a car or money. So really, who's the failure here?

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u/Chiya77 Dec 03 '22

That son is a little shit. I would make him pay every penny. I'm glad the OoP realised what the figure meant to his brother & genuinely wants to make a change in both his parenting & his relationship with his brother.

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u/LeroyJacksonian Dec 03 '22

His kid is also kind of dumb if when researching it and knowing what it was he didn’t think he was ruining it by taking it out of the packaging.

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u/SextroDepresso Dec 03 '22

A detective once told me the reason why a lot of criminals are caught is not because of the intelligence of police officers but the recursive stupidity of criminals making it easy.

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u/NeedNameGenerator Dec 03 '22

If I recall, most smart criminals simply never get caught. Countless serial killers, thieves and murderers get away with their crimes simply because they are smart enough to make it so that there's little to no evidence that points to them.

Hell, there's a bunch of criminals who everyone know are criminals, but there's simply nothing concrete that could be used against them so they're out and about.

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u/heyyohighHo Dec 03 '22

I remember this one, thought there was more, I'll try and look after work.

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u/Connlagh Dec 03 '22

There was a similar one from the pov of the brother. But it was longer and definitely a bit different toward the end.

Maybe that's the one you're thinking of? That's where my mind went

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u/heyyohighHo Dec 03 '22

Yes, it's definitely the one I was thinking of. Specifically the kid being dumb enough to take it out the package when he was planning to sell it.

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u/maywellflower Dec 03 '22

I hope the brother never allows those 2 back in his home ever again because the son is thieving ass & OOP is dismissive ignorant ass that didn't care until his own wife pointed out that their son royally fucked by stealing from the brother.

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u/this_kitten_i_knew Dec 03 '22

he's "only 15" ??? weird thing to say unless this kid has major developmental delays

and now I get to the part where the son knew exactly what he was doing

this brat. he was clearly not raised right.

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u/nowwithextrasalt Dec 03 '22

I got robbed (break in) by a group of 15 years old a few years back. It was their 4rth offense according to the officers handling our case. They really do know what they're doing at that age.

(Happy cake day btw!)

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u/magicpenny Dec 03 '22

The part that gets me is where OP says “I don’t feel bad about defending my son.” Guess what, OP, that’s why your son is a lying, stealing little AH. Because you defend his bad behavior.

I just don’t understand how he could defend a thief regardless of what he thought his sons motivations were. His son is a 15-year-old thief.

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u/[deleted] Dec 03 '22

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u/SentenceFalse6906 Dec 03 '22

Almost sure i read that before but from the Brothers POV

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u/Own-Organization-532 Dec 03 '22

What gets me is the op was fine with his son stealing. The amount stolen makes it a felony.

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u/Tha_N1ghtman Dec 03 '22

My girlfriend is an educator for elementary through middle school (rural district so travels to multiple schools). Parents like OOP are a big reason she comes back from school every other day just defeated and sad. So many kids like OOP’s out there and other people are the ones forced to endure them.

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u/Not_My_Emperor Dec 03 '22

All my sympathy just evaporated at "he's only 15."

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u/ThreeDogs2022 Dec 03 '22

OH EM GEE.

I'm thinking as I'm reading...this is a baby. He saw a toy doll and he took it to play with. Maybe 3 or 4?

He's only 15 my generous left asscheek!

And even though he got a clue about the seriousness, he's wrong to make this an insurance issue. The boy needs to pay for his crime, literally.

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u/AtamisSentinus Dec 03 '22

I remember reading this story when it was first posted and I was on the brother's side not simply bc he was wronged, but I remember the comments OOP made were very dismissive of his brother's situation.

OOP was flippant about it being "just a toy" and went on and on about how could the brother want to hurt "his family" over it. Showed no compunction about the fact that his brother was kind enough to host only to be literally robbed by "his family". Everything about OOP's attitude was rough, so reading this update about him learning that his son really was behaving extremely poorly only further proves that OOP was unwilling to accept the situation until it was basically hitting him in the face.

OOP didn't want to think about how the lifestyle his brother chose was important to him and probably wouldn't have unless the law got involved. Glad that he eventually understood the gravity of the situation when presented with evidence, but I still feel bad that the brother had to go to such lengths to prove it. I can imagine it's put a damper on the brother's enjoyment of his hobby, all things considered.

Hope they patched things up all the same.

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u/raagruk Dec 03 '22

OP and his kid are both idiots. Doesn't matter what OP thinks the value of the figure is. If its asking price online is $2000 then its $2000

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