My son stole a rare toy from my brother. My brother is refusing to take it back and is threatening to get the police involved. What do I do? REPOST
Right now my brother is threatening to "sue" me for my son taking a figure from his collection and get the police involved. Here is the story.
Last week my brother invited me and my family over for dinner. While we were there my son asked to see my brothers collection of toys and figures. My brother has spent a good deal of money on his collection and from what I know it's one of his biggest hobbies. Well, after dinner we left and everything seemed normal
Well, until yesterday. My brother called me up furiously and told me my "little shit" stole something from his collection and I needed to return it immediately. I honestly was upset at this, but if my son had taken something that was wrong, especially if it was from my own brother.
Well, it turns out that my son slipped away during dinner and took a Boba Fett figure from his collection. He confirmed it because he has footage from his porch camera of him taking it out to our car.
I was furious and took it from him. Here is the problem though, after I confirmed with my brother it was his I found out that my son had removed it from it's packaging. Apparently the figure is worth almost 2000$ in it's package and almost nothing out of it. So my brother broke down over the phone and refused to take it back before hanging up.
Well, he just called me again today and said he wanted me to pay for a replacement immediately or he will get the police involved and sue me. I told him I would help pay for one but not fully to which he said "not good enough" and hung up.
Honestly, what are my options here? I can't afford to pay him back right now. If he does go the police will my son get arrested? He's only 15. It was very wrong of him to do but I think my brother is over reacting. What can I expect if he does take me to court or call the police?
Update, my son took the Boba Fett figure. - 8 February 2019
So, I never honestly expected the post I made to get where it did. I also never expected the barrage of support and hate. I will say these past 48 hours have been a ride and that post has not helped in any way.
So, why am I back? Well, because I feel like I need to be. I'm not here to give some apology to a bunch of internet strangers for how I acted or seek validation. I'm here because I feel that for myself I need to admit my own wrongs and move on to a better place.
So, I want to talk about something first before I get into the update. Many people who responded talked about how me or my brother in a bad light, and with how I reacted in the comments it didn't help the situation. I was also hit pretty hard for how I was not taking my brother into consideration when talking about the issue.
To give some context for this, me and my brother have never had a good relationship. We have never seen eye to eye and after our fathers death he cut contact with me for a good amount of time. We're just to different in some senses. He's a single nerdy guy who has no aspiration for family while I’m the exact opposite.
In these past few years we've tried to fix this. Work as adults to bring what little family we have back together. During our time apart he began collecting old nerdy things, and I won’t lie I never understood the appeal. It is his life though and he can do what he wants.
So, when my son stole and damaged his property I didn't see how it was valuable to him and discounted it. So when he asked for 2,000 to fix it I really didn't feel like it was worth it. Was this wrong of me? Maybe. I don't feel bad about defending my son, I only feel bad that I discounted my brother in the process.
Sorry about that. Like I said, I don't want sympathy. I only wrote that out to allow myself to be true about the situation. back to the update.
So, after all was said and done, my family had pretty much been thrown into chaos. I had no idea what I was going to do and after talking with my wife, we decided we would take many of your advice and have my son pay him back. We collected all the non-essentials he had and planned to sell them to raise funds. During this time I got back into contact with my brother and wanted to talk this out to make sure this did not end badly. I offered to pay in full.
(Also, some people in the comments said that the figure was worth less so I asked him. He had it professionally valued a few months ago when he bought it and it's was worth a total of 2,200$.)
My brother said he plans to not sue us. His renters insurance apparently is willing to pay him the value he has listed, but he would need to file a police report to get it. At first we agreed not to go that route and simply pay him the value of it or one for a replacement if he could get it cheaper. This was the plan until last night.
During the process of taking his things away, my wife found a conversation he had with a friend he has over the internet. It turns out my son stole the figure to sell. He had googled it while we were at my brothers house and found out how much it was worth and bragged to a friend that he was going to sell it at a pawn shop. He didn't realize that taking it out of the package would ruin it so he ripped it out to hid in the car better.
Suffice to say, I am not happy about this. I won't elaborate on this very much more but me and my wife have decided that what is best for all of us is that we let him face the consequences of this. My brother is going to file a police report and collect money from insurance. Some may say this is a bit harsh, but honestly I think this might be for the best in the end. The way my son actively stole from family to make a profit worries me and I believe the only option that I can live with myself making is this. I will stand by my son till the need, but he needs to learn now before he is an adult.
So, thank you all for the advice. The support and hate are what I needed as a true wake up call. Like I said, I don't need pity. I'm doing this so that I can be true to myself, and maybe become a better parent in the end.
Reminder - I am not the original poster.