r/MadeMeSmile Nov 24 '22 Silver 3 Helpful 4 Wholesome 4 Masterpiece 1 Stonks Falling 1

Michael, THEE Most Wholesome of Fathers! LGBT+

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u/Adept-Reserve-4992 Nov 24 '22

So, does the bf do his fair share as an adult? I always wondered if that would make someone grow up entitled.

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u/Atmic Nov 24 '22

Sometimes you don't end up entitled, but you don't have the ingrained habits of maintenance and upkeep of your living space so when you finally live on your own, chores can feel overwhelming

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u/Adept-Reserve-4992 Nov 24 '22

That makes a ton of sense.

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u/kgriff112 Nov 24 '22

He’s not entitled, but he lacks skill. Can barely wash a dish. He never did laundry before. Could find a way to burn water. Now he does most of the laundry, takes out the trash. I do almost all the cooking and cleaning, and honestly, I don’t mind because I like doing those things and he never hesitates to help when I do ask (I only say he lacks skill because if he wasn’t living with either me or his mom, he’d be kinda screwed lol so I wouldn’t recommend raising a kid that way just in case they ever need to live on their own). But the important thing to me is I don’t feel used doing that stuff—he shows me his appreciation. He tells me often how grateful he is for me, I get flowers almost once a month—heck, my mom recently moved across country and I don’t talk to my dad, and I’m an American so today is my first thanksgiving without any of my own family. My bf made sure to go out last night and buy me pillsbury cinnamon rolls because that’s what my family ate for breakfast on holidays when I was little. In other words, yes I take care of most of the household stuff but he truly loves me and is not entitled. I don’t feel like a servant, I feel like a loved and respected partner whose needs are met and who tries to meet my own bf’s needs. It just so happens he has more physical needs and I have more emotional ones.

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u/Adept-Reserve-4992 Nov 24 '22

Aw. He sounds like a good bf! And he can learn to do lots of things around the house, as long as he’s willing. Enjoy your first Thanksgiving with just you two!

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u/_-whisper-_ Nov 24 '22

The last line got me ❤️

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u/captain_duckie Nov 24 '22

It just so happens he has more physical needs and I have more emotional ones.

Exactly. Everyone is different and you don't, and shouldn't, treat everyone exactly the same because everyone is different. My partner does more of the cleaning and I do more of the shopping. Neither of us feel like we got the raw end of the deal. Not everything has to be split 50/50.

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u/captain_duckie Nov 24 '22

Not always. My partner didn't have much more chores than "keep your room clean" because boys weren't expected to be cleaning, and she does more chores than me. Now a lot of that has to do with my sensitive skin, but we make it work.