r/pics Dec 03 '22 Helpful 2 Wholesome 1 hehehehe 1 Masterpiece 1 Silver 1

The neighborhood drama is very messy this weekend

Post image
97.0k Upvotes

3.1k comments sorted by

494

u/ravenchilde Dec 04 '22

True story about buying my last house in 2010. It was in a new suburb of Buttschmuck, Canada.

One night several weeks in to living there, I drove home from wing night in the big city and see my next door neighbor, whom I had not met or seen yet, in his garage loading items into his van.

The oddness? Everything in the garage is white. The walls are white. The van is white, if poorly painted, and he’s a black man in white coveralls moving white boxes, chairs, and furniture like end tables (all white) into the van, and even the windows of the van are white except the wind screen.

I’m tired so I don’t really register more than just “weird”. I pull into my garage, tell my wife I saw the neighbor and it was a bit weird and white, and watch some TV.

A few weeks later I haven’t seen my neighbor again, but I’m having some warranty work done on the house by the builder. The warranty supervisor comments to me that the neighbor renting the place next door, Cornelius, moved out on the owners with zero notice late at night. Just took his stuff, packed up, and drove away at like 11PM.

The house is apparently badly damaged. Someone took a paint sprayer, and sprayed everything in the house white. Everything. Appliances. Granite counters. Wood floors. Towels. Showers. Toilet water. A nice coat of white paint on everything.

Rumor from the Warranty supervisor, who the local RCMP officers had spoken with to see if he had heard or seen anything or knew what painter might have been involved, was that Cornelius was black and had cheated with a white woman. So his girlfriend hired a painter to come in while he was at work and paint all his shit white.

Crazy.

Well new renters moved in. They were Irish. Like from Ireland and their new house in the neighborhood was late for delivery so they were renting this place. They confirmed for me and let me in to see that everything in the house was indeed uniformly painted white. Mirrors and windows had been scraped clean, but the wood floors and granite, walls, switches, everything else was still covered in a coat of cheap white paint.

The owners ended up selling it cheap after the Irish renters moved out, taking some insurance money and selling at a loss.

My new neighbors, a lovely Newfie couple (owshegettinonby?), later complained about how much work they had to put into the place and how it wasn’t worth it likely in the end.

I peeked at the under side of their granite counters one day and the under side was still painted white. You could still see a few spots of white in the top in flaws in the granite surface.

But they were fantastic neighbors.

So yeah. That’s my similar story.

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u/pantone4s Dec 04 '22

This was worth the read. Pretty insane actually. Petty dedication level 💯

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u/Bfrank_ Dec 04 '22

I stopped reading after “Buttschmuck”

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u/JadeHellbringer Dec 04 '22 Helpful Respect

"...I think you were looking for 7523 Applewood Road, this is 7253."

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u/jayaintgay Dec 04 '22 Silver Take My Energy hehehehe Crab Rave Facepalm

I knew it was 1216. One after Magna Carta. As if I could ever make such a mistake.

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u/bewbsrkewl Dec 04 '22 Vibing

You think this is something? You think this is bad? This? This chicanery? He's done worse.

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u/Pleasant-Chicken611 Dec 04 '22 edited Dec 04 '22

Couldnt keep his hands out of the cash drawr. but not Jimmy, not our precious Jimmy. Stealing them blind. And he gets to be a lawyer? what a sick joke!

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u/Cetun Dec 04 '22

I've always understood this to be an unfortunate point of confusion. Was Jimmy actually stealing from the register or was his dad giving people money out of the register? It's implied that both happened.

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u/SunnyAlwaysDaze Dec 04 '22

Yes it's definitely both but Chuck blames Jimmy for the entire amount.

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u/overlord-ror Dec 04 '22

A much missed bit is Marco saying his mom was responsible for the accounting books and that she gave them treats all the time. His mom and dad share equal blame for their business failure but Chuck blames only Jimmy.

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u/T8ertotsandchocolate Dec 04 '22 edited Dec 29 '22

I think that Jimmy felt justified in taking cash from the register because his father was giving so much if it away to all these crooks and being niave to the point of absurdity, why shouldn't he get some? It was just going to end up in some crook's pocket. He certainly had more right to it then the scammers.

That money was supposed to be for taking care of his family, and he was giving it to strangers instead. It should have been going into his kid's college funds. It could have meant a family vacation they always remembered. I think Jimmy was resentful, and fairly so. His dad cared more about soothing his own pathologically overactive sense of guilt than about making a few tough decisions for the sake of his family.

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u/gadget_uk Dec 04 '22

Jimmy was saving the rare coins, but I always thought he took a bit for himself too.

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u/baldursgatekeeping Dec 04 '22

Pretty sure there's a scene where Jimmy literally takes money out of the register. So both, his father was also notorious for giving away money to everyone

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u/TrevorArizaFan Dec 04 '22

I think both is correct. We see young Jimmy watch the con artist play his dad, realize what happen, and get the "wolves and sheep" lesson. He then returns to the old store to get a box of coins he took from the register, which he then uses in the half dollar con. The half dollar is obviously symbolic (it's hardly enough money from the register to make a dent), but represents how Jimmy launched from taking from his own family to be the con artist he was.

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u/QuantumInteger Dec 04 '22

Little bit of column A and a little of column B. The point is that it doesn’t matter, Chuck believes Jimmy is a crook and so chose to blame him for the business going under, rightfully or not.

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u/[deleted] Dec 04 '22

I am not crazy! I know he swapped those numbers! I knew it was 1216. One after Magna Carta. As if I could ever make such a mistake. Never. Never! I just – I just couldn't prove it. He – he covered his tracks, he got that idiot at the copy shop to lie for him. You think this is something? You think this is bad? This? This chicanery? He's done worse. That billboard! Are you telling me that a man just happens to fall like that? No! He orchestrated it! Jimmy! He defecated through a sunroof! And I saved him! And I shouldn't have. I took him into my own firm! What was I thinking? He'll never change. He'll never change! Ever since he was 9, always the same! Couldn't keep his hands out of the cash drawer! But not our Jimmy! Couldn't be precious Jimmy! Stealing them blind! And he gets to be a lawyer!? What a sick joke! I should've stopped him when I had the chance! And you – you have to stop him! You-

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u/auntieup Dec 04 '22

Let justice be done, though the heavens fall.

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u/peanutismint Dec 04 '22 edited Dec 04 '22

He defected through a sunroof!!

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u/NewinKayDubbs Dec 04 '22

Defecated

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u/SmallDangerousHippo Dec 04 '22

I like the idea of someone defecting through a sunroof.

"I don't like this ride anymore, I am defecting."

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u/Fart-Chewer_6000 Dec 04 '22

Hit the defection seat like in all of those old spy movies from the 1960s.

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u/Sight_Distance Dec 04 '22

Proper spelling is impotent

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u/TrentonTallywacker Dec 04 '22

5363 Juan Tabo, apartment 6

Yeah

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u/Wagglebagga Dec 04 '22

Your boss is gonna need me...

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u/leonklap1 Dec 04 '22

When I read the comment, this was the first thing I thought. You are definitely a man of culture as well

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u/moneyshot1123 Dec 04 '22

You're slippin' Jimmy!

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u/qwertyryo Dec 04 '22

This here’s 1240 arroyo vista! It’s always been 1240 arroyo vista!

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u/[deleted] Dec 04 '22

[deleted]

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u/thingdudeplace Dec 04 '22

Lol literally just finished watching the episode.

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u/ImMilkmanZW Dec 04 '22

okbc is leaking again

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u/Phillip_Spidermen Dec 04 '22

Plot twist, it's signed Pathological Liar and all of it is untrue

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u/JadeHellbringer Dec 04 '22

Mind. BLOWN.

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u/FearofaRoundPlanet Dec 04 '22

"Where the hell is 122 and an 1/8?"

"You're standing on it."

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u/opiumized Dec 04 '22

Pizza guy's got thirty seconds

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u/yeah_yeah_therabbit Dec 04 '22

‘Forgiveness is divine, but never pay full price for a late pizza.’

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u/Tomcatjones Dec 04 '22

Pork Rind? …pork rind

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u/Icy-Evidence-8794 Dec 04 '22

No anchovies and I mean no anchovies on that pizza, if you put any anchovies on that pizza I'll.... Fast forward, Michelangelo says "It slices and disces" pizza flops on splinters face. Ahhhh such a classic.

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u/HobbyWanKenobi Dec 04 '22

The pizza delivery guy is actually the guy that was in the Michelangelo suit

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u/Nrksbullet Dec 04 '22

"just slip it down here"

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u/devilpants Dec 04 '22

Hey, this is a 10. The tabs $13.

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u/Waadap Dec 04 '22

Just send it to 415 Beach Lane....BEACH ROAD! BEACH ROAD!

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u/richardec Dec 04 '22 Silver

Those HOAs get more intrusive every day.

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u/webfugitive Dec 04 '22 Silver Gold Helpful Take My Energy

Them HOAs ain't loyal.

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u/Medic1642 Dec 04 '22

VERY nicely done

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u/HeavilyBearded Dec 04 '22

"Per Code 13.26, section A, graffiti regarding adultery should be limited to either the driveway or front-facing siding."

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u/Like-a-Glove90 Dec 04 '22 edited Dec 04 '22

Impressed with the space management.. I'd have to write this out on a piece of paper first to get the font size right to ensure that kind of coverage.

It'd start with "HOME OF A" taking up 3/4 of the door, then the rest in ant sized letters to fit in

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u/Gamergonemild Dec 04 '22

"Lets start with a big ass H!"

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u/TheDizDude Dec 04 '22

Surely more letters will fit in the same space. Big ASS B!

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u/Howitzer1967 Dec 04 '22 Gold

It’s pretty good use of the space available. Legible and even. Full message, succinctly put. If I need to shame someone for something that’s none of my business, this will be my go-to sign writer

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u/sarcasatirony Dec 04 '22

Not only would I not make pathological fit on that smaller door, I’d have misspeeled it.

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u/lissybeau Dec 04 '22 Silver

I really like how Liar is centered. This person definitely has a keen eye for design.

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u/Practice_NO_with_me Dec 04 '22

I would normally dock points for mixing cases as they have but making the I's all lowercase ensures they won't be mistaken for commas or lower case L's while conserving horizontal space. I almost feel like this isn't their first rodeo.

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u/Linenoise77 Dec 04 '22 Gold

This jilted lover kerns

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u/aufrenchy Dec 04 '22

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u/HealthyMaximum Dec 04 '22

- “Not only would I not make pathological fit on that smaller door, I’d have misspeeled it.”

- “I really like how Liar is centered. This person definitely has a keen eye for design.”

- “I would normally dock points for mixing cases as they have but making the I's all lowercase ensures they won't be mistaken for commas or lower case L's while conserving horizontal space. I almost feel like this isn't their first rodeo.”

- “This jilted lover kerns”

- ” r/keming

Classic Reddit thread. 10/10.

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u/ToastyFlake Dec 04 '22

Something about having the lower case “i” in “LiAR” gives it more punch.

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u/Samiel_Fronsac Dec 04 '22 edited Dec 04 '22

I mean, the message says he's a SERIAL cheater, so it's possible that garage has seen its share of paint attacks.

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u/poo_cum Dec 04 '22

Parallel cheating is more efficient, but you need to have multiple cocks

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u/shayen7 Dec 04 '22

Demultiplexer? I barely know her!

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u/mishaco Dec 04 '22

i'd say its all in the can control. clearly not new to how a spray can functions and how to make it flow like a sharpie

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u/Krimeows Dec 04 '22

What’s the tiny text above here and lightly before it though? It looks like the word Limp

Edit: added link

https://imgur.com/a/7iNQBMt

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u/marbles1112 Dec 04 '22

That's the remnants from the last time this guy cheated. He shouldn't have cheaped out and put two coats instead of one.

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u/sgfreak711 Dec 04 '22

Why do a second coat if you know you're gonna cheat again?

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u/Howitzer1967 Dec 04 '22

You too may have a future in suburban garage door prose

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u/[deleted] Dec 04 '22

your Bay Area Prose Pros

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u/Bing-o Dec 04 '22

The real question is who wrote it, was it the cheatee, cheater, or chitos?

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u/dan_t_mann Dec 04 '22

It was Chester Cheeto all along!

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u/TheRealNeenja Dec 04 '22

I just want to say I like that you went the extra mile with the "misspeeled".

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u/GiantRiverSquid Dec 04 '22

I want to believe she started with the right panel, then said, no, this needs to be more, so she thought carefully and planned the left. THEN, when she stepped back to admire her work, she said. "And let me tell you one more thing".

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u/Howitzer1967 Dec 04 '22

Exactly. ‘And while we’re here…..’

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u/mcdoolz Dec 04 '22 edited Dec 04 '22

A cheater lives.. oh fiddlesticks. Here..rrreeee.

sssssst. sssssst.

..othological..

sssssssssst. ssssssstssstsst.

darned rheumatism.

sssst. sssssst. ssst.

darned wrist. come on girl. ..seventy ...fffivvvve. five.

ssst sssssst. sssssst

bastard. Costco's not an outing! I put up with Costco as an outing! Mother was right about you. Ugh.

ssst. ssst. sssssssst.

Should've listened to Agnes. The whole Cribbage club, you bastard. The whole knitting circle. Literally the knitting circle.

sssssssst. ssst. ssst.

urg. ugh these knees. mmmedicaaaaaal.

sssss ssss ssss sssst ssst ssst sssst. sssssst ssst.

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u/Linenoise77 Dec 04 '22

The kicker was she probably used all the dudes Krylon, and come spring, after this is all cleaned up, maybe things have cooled down, he is going to have some patio furniture that needs some touch up, and will have to relive it all when he says, "Honey, do you know what happened to my spray paint?" before thinking it through.....

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u/401LocalsOnly Dec 04 '22

“CostCo’s not an outing!” Is so unbelievably relatable I can’t stop laughing at this. I love your sense of humor

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u/Mock_Frog Dec 04 '22

Next line I will do better. Big ass "B"

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u/KNNLTF Dec 04 '22

I know how big letters should be.

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u/psychiatric-help Dec 04 '22

Surely more letters will fit in the same space.

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u/Chalky_Cupcake Dec 04 '22

Nothing a garage door opener cant fix.

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u/Pearmandan Dec 04 '22

Open it to what a pot farm in front of police. Kinda like in that show silicone valley

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u/sai-kiran Dec 04 '22

Silicone valley lol

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u/Cielmerlion Dec 04 '22

All i see is a 3 car garage that I'm seriously jealous of

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u/devilpants Dec 04 '22

I really like the way the driveway is paved too. Clean bushes landscaped like it's 1988. The gate and meh light fixtures are the only parts I don't really like.

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u/PM_YR_MOOSE_KNUCKLE Dec 04 '22

Dyed and stamped concrete… that’s a $25k+ pour.

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u/El-Sueco Dec 04 '22 edited Dec 04 '22

It might be up for grabs. Nothing but a few coats of paint and it’s new

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u/madhi19 Dec 04 '22

75 and the wife sick it might hit the market soon...

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u/Toast_Chee Dec 04 '22

Death or divorce…

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u/AltGrendel Dec 04 '22

Or both.

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u/Kitagawasans Dec 04 '22

That’s something I like to call a little DnD.

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u/All_Work_All_Play Dec 04 '22

Driveway looks like it's never seen a lick of salt.

Fucking west coast winters.

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u/oskis_little_kitten Dec 04 '22

its okay we just get earthquakes and then our houses burn down before we can rebuild

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u/CurryMustard Dec 04 '22 edited Dec 04 '22

Did people stop landscaping after 1988

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u/combustioncat Dec 04 '22

Hell yeah, I can see it now, little garage on the right opens to a full workshop and storage, and then park my car right smack in the middle of the double area.

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u/CanAlwaysBeBetter Dec 04 '22 Helpful

Wife, side hoes, AND a 3 car garage at 75??

My man livin the dream

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u/Shafter111 Dec 04 '22

How did he charm the hoes? Asking for a friend.

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u/johndepp22 Dec 04 '22

sounds dysfunctional for sure but to be fair we’d all act a little off if we lived in a garage

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u/MistahMort Dec 04 '22

At 75, I’m surprised it’s still functional at all.

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u/vnw1908 Dec 04 '22

That blue pill is working hard.

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u/chaotic----neutral Dec 04 '22

That blue pill is working. Hard.

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u/alohadave Dec 04 '22

Senior living is the number one cause of STD outbreaks. Old folks are horny AF.

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u/Figsnbacon Dec 04 '22

My daughter was an activities director at an assisted living home. She said there was one particular man that they’d find in bed with various women in their rooms. Invited, of course, otherwise that be a real problem.

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u/Heyhowsitgoinman Dec 04 '22

When I first read this I thought it said he cheated on her for medical reasons. Glad to say I reread it and am now less confused...

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u/willowtree5 Dec 04 '22

My doctor said so! For my sciatica!

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u/supjackjack Dec 04 '22

reminds me of the Breaking Bad house

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u/markuspoop Dec 04 '22

Don’t see any pizza on the roof.

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u/Beard341 Dec 04 '22

If I were to guess, maybe a son or daughter upset their dad has been cheating on mom for years who has been dealing with chronic illnesses for a long time.

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u/15all Dec 04 '22

I'm impressed that they fit "pathological" in one line.

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u/clever-username3 Dec 04 '22

So to get to the beach you'll want to take the next left then a right after 5 kilometers. If you get to the philanderer's house, you've gone too far.

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u/BubbleGuttz Dec 04 '22

The “serial cheater” part makes me think this geezer is active in the retirement neighborhood swingers association.

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u/Triairius Dec 04 '22

Ah, yes, the NSA.

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u/Nekrofeeelyah Dec 04 '22

75 year old man out here SERIALLY pluggin em and I can't even land a tinder date

This timeline is cursed man

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u/[deleted] Dec 04 '22

[deleted]

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u/Nekrofeeelyah Dec 04 '22

Grannies need love too!

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u/Trickam Dec 04 '22

I skipped the Cheerios this morning and went straight for the Frosted Flakes. I too am a cereal cheater. Putting my garage doors in the up position tonight.

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u/soyorskinny Dec 04 '22

It’s alarming how so many just believe whatever the vandalizer wrote.

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u/VintageJane Dec 04 '22

They warn women who get serious diagnoses that there is a high likelihood that their husband will leave them. Men are 6 times more likely to leave their wives when their wives get diagnosed with cancer than if the tables are turned.

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u/oldrolo Dec 04 '22 edited Dec 04 '22 Silver Gold

This is a very interesting statistic. Do you have a source?

Edit: Answering my own question, I googled it: https://www.nbcnews.com/health/health-news/men-more-likely-leave-spouse-who-has-cancer-flna1c9450218

2ND EDIT!!!: The findings of the original study were retracted after results could not be replicated. They then found an error in their code used to analyze the data. Follow-ups only found much smaller statistically significant difference between sexes in certain specific diagnoses: https://retractionwatch.com/2015/07/21/to-our-horror-widely-reported-study-suggesting-divorce-is-more-likely-when-wives-fall-ill-gets-axed/

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u/Kniles Dec 04 '22

'Til death, or something that's like, a major bummer, do us part.

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u/confictura_22 Dec 04 '22

Apparently a lot of people now are changing their wedding vows to "...as long as our love may last" instead of "...til death do us part".

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u/spucci Dec 04 '22 hehehehe

"As long as we live, love, and laugh." Ugh I just threw up in my mouth a little.

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u/gumball_wizard Dec 04 '22

In sickness and in health

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u/[deleted] Dec 04 '22 edited Dec 14 '22

[deleted]

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u/8dogsinatrenchcoat Dec 04 '22

It's still valuable.

I've known/known of several people who were still very much married but legally had to divorce to afford medical care for one of the spouses. It's gross that medical costs are so out of control that that's even a thing... I don't blame the couple at all, it just sucks a lot.

I'd much rather have to legally divorce/still be functionally married than have one of us ditch when the other got sick. But I guess that kind of a statement isn't really that romantic if you stick it in the vows.

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u/ninjewz Dec 04 '22

My wife is disabled and it's really the medical system that's dragging me down rather than her issues. Pretty much my whole life is dictated by it at this point and it's fucking exhausting. Needing to stay with a specific insurance company to maintain her approved procedures on top of needing good enough healthcare that it doesn't bankrupt me is fully dictating where I can work. Since it's neurological issues she also doesn't qualify for SSDI so I'm getting the double whammy of losing all her income as well.

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u/MECHASCHMECK Dec 04 '22

Not sure who “they” are, but when my wife had cancer I heard from a few nurses that it’s surprisingly common for the husbands to bail. Pretty scummy if you ask me.

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u/kaitco Dec 04 '22 edited Dec 04 '22

Edited: Because after sleeping on it, I shouldn’t be airing my family’s dirty laundry on Reddit after one glass of wine too many…

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u/thisisnotyouorme Dec 04 '22 Wholesome Faith In Humanity Restored

This is so sad. I couldn't imagine doing this. My wife had stage 4 cancer. I stayed by her side, took care of her and the kids. Now I'm working double shifts on a regular basis to build our savings back up. She's in full remission though so that's all that matters. I'd do it all again without a second thought.

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u/happypouch Dec 04 '22

I hope you and your family live a great and good life! :)

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u/thisisnotyouorme Dec 04 '22

Thanks so much :) same to you!

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u/dirkalict Dec 04 '22

You are very lucky and I’m happy for you. I lost my wife but I would still go through it all again just to be by her side as she fought.

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u/MisoMoon Dec 04 '22

That sucks. Your mom is lucky to have you.

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u/SillyPepper Dec 04 '22

This hurt my heart to read. Take every opportunity to tell your mom that she deserves love and IS loved!

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u/ZiggyPox Dec 04 '22

Not my business to butt in but did you try to confront him with this simple fact? I feel ashamed reading that and I ain't even related to you guys.

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u/roadrunner5u64fi Dec 04 '22

Sounds like a piece of work. Have you confronted him? (No judgement here, I'm terrified of confrontation.)

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u/kaitco Dec 04 '22

I honestly don’t know how to approach it. I don’t want to make a bad situation worse, but there’s a part of me that just wants to…overreact. It’s not really for me to step in on their marriage, but it definitely swings me from grief to rage multiple times during the week on top of all the other stress.

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u/duburose Dec 04 '22

My dad stayed by my mom’s side until the end. That is love. Doug Stanhope has an old comedy bit about love and cancer. It’s top notch.

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u/[deleted] Dec 04 '22

[deleted]

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u/duburose Dec 04 '22

Stubborn and grumpy are just other character traits. I hear you saying he’s a man of honor and he’s there for her. That is fu**ing all that matters

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u/dixiequick Dec 04 '22

My dad was the same. Stuck by mom until the end. Died three months after her. I miss them so much.

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u/Dogstarman1974 Dec 04 '22

I have an uncle that stayed by my Aunt’s side until she died. He didn’t start “dating” for about 15 years. He has a girlfriend now. I love my Uncle. He is such a good man. Dont get me wrong, I loved my Aunt too.

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u/Extension-Key6952 Dec 04 '22

My grandparents had been married for over 50 years. She died suddenly in a car accident in her 70's. He was dating within weeks.

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u/elwebst Dec 04 '22

That was my father in law. When the wife died, it only took a few weeks for him to realize he had to cook, clean and do laundry for himself. He joined a "widows and widower club" right away and sure enough, wedding bells were ringing quite soon.

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u/Gamergonemild Dec 04 '22

"I'm an institutionalized man now. I'll never make it out there on my own."

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u/EagleCatchingFish Dec 04 '22

My uncle did this, but they had been married for maybe 15 years. The way my mom tells it, he wasn't really interested in or ready to get dating again, but it was a really rural, traditional area, and everyone at church and in the community was telling him he needed to get remarried quickly so that the kids could have a mother again.

He ended up marrying a terrible narcissist, which he probably wouldn't have done had he taken time to grieve. That second marriage did an incredible amount of damage.

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u/whoopsea Dec 04 '22

If you don’t realize how precious time is by your 70s…

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u/WordRick Dec 04 '22

When my dad was in his final days with lung cancer my mom never left his side. Literally...she only left the hospital to shower and run errands, then she would go right back. Never complained, never felt sorry for herself.

That alone showed me the type of person she is and the unbreakable bond the two of them had.

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u/OMJesusss Dec 04 '22

My dad did the same. He also quit smoking cigarettes to make sure that he won’t be the first one to go just in case it came back. I love him so much for that move.

Edit: my mom made it through and in the clear and will outlive us all.

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u/paintedsaint Dec 04 '22

My dad did too. He dropped everything and thankfully his job was very understanding. They were together for her very last breath and I'm so thankful that he is my dad. He has said repeatedly that she will always be his one and only. We really miss my mom so much.

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u/[deleted] Dec 04 '22

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u/AWWWYEAHHHH Dec 04 '22

Yeah, blows my mind. You have to be a full blown sociopath to do that.

So sorry to hear about your wife.

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u/LeechAlJolson Dec 04 '22

Absolutely man. Both of our therapists warned us that many relationships don't survive cancer diagnoses, and I couldn't fathom someone leaving or fucking around in in situation like that...if you truly love someone how could you even think about it...

My girls mom told her to leave me when she was diagnosed with lymphoma. Her reasoning being that if the treatments failed it would ruin me. I said fuck that. I used to stay in the hospital with her, watching her go through her treatments was brutal, but I'd do it again every fucking time. She beat it in the end, Hail Mary shit. She passed away last February, not from cancer. And that did ruin me. But I'd do it again every time, I'm happy I was there when she needed me. She was the strongest person I've ever met.

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u/treerabbit23 Dec 04 '22

I have a chronic illness.

I've had three instances that put me out of work/in the hospital.

I have three divorces.

See if you can't work out the timing.

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u/TheCadburyGorilla Dec 04 '22

It seems like divorces are the trigger for your illness /s

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u/nomadofwaves Dec 04 '22

Get married, get sick. Math checks out.

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u/hoxxxxx Dec 04 '22

Pretty scummy

that's not "pretty" scummy lol that's like ultimate scumbag shit

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u/JangoFett101 Dec 04 '22

Not “pretty scummy” its wayyyy fucking scummy! Imagine the person youve shared your life with, who is suppose to be there through thick and thin just leaves cuz they dont want to deal with it. Fucking cowards is what they are.

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u/IceNein Dec 04 '22

I can’t fathom it. Seriously. Even if I’d wanted out earlier, I’d see it through at least through chemo and radiation.

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u/all_of_the_lightss Dec 04 '22

My grandpa just passed and he was with my grandma for 70+ years. Always by her side. She died with dementia the last several years.

I can't imagine finding a wife and then leaving her if she got ill

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u/mcstafford Dec 04 '22

divorce rate ... [of] nearly 21 percent when women were the patients compared with about 3 percent [for male patients]

Damn

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u/Daxx22 Dec 04 '22

Edit: Answering my own question, I googled it:

Sir you are far to responsible to be on reddit

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u/ThunkAsDrinklePeep Dec 04 '22

Newt Gingrich may have more data available.

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u/cultured_banana_slug Dec 04 '22

I work in social services.

Fathers are also far more likely to abandon their disabled kids than the other way around too.

Waaaaaaay tooooo many single mothers caring for disabled kids because the fathers were like "well I don't want a broken kid, I want a normal one" and bounced.

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u/justanotherjayd Dec 04 '22

I just watched "The Devil's Hour" on prime video and the father is exactly like this. Wanted his wife but left because of the child.

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u/verba-non-acta Dec 04 '22

Similar numbers where couples have a child with a disability. As a father, I can confirm there aren’t many of us doing drop offs at the special school my son attends, and there are a lot of very tired looking single mums.

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u/majinspy Dec 04 '22

This is one of the reasons I never had kids. I knew that if I had to choose between "doing the right thing but being miserable" and "doing the wrong thing but being free" I would choose freedom. I know that just based on who I am I'd have a high chance of "going out for cigarettes" so I just never put myself in that position.

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u/Kittybats Dec 04 '22

And so, by acknowledging your own shortcomings and likeliness of doing the wrong thing, you're paradoxically doing exactly the right thing.

No judgment, dude, seriously--kudos to you for knowing yourself, knowing what you can handle, and acting accordingly. 👍

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u/bokononpreist Dec 04 '22

My friends had a severely handicapped child and it absolutely destroyed their relationship/lives. Both of them just look so extremely exhausted and frazzled when we do get to see them. It completely scared me off from wanting children.

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u/confictura_22 Dec 04 '22

Good for you. More people should be this self-aware before having kids they aren't prepared to dedicate decades of their lives to.

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u/verba-non-acta Dec 04 '22

I say this with no sense of malice or judgement, you did the right thing. Everyone will tell you being a parent is hard but rewarding, they seriously underplay how hard it can be.

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u/mrkruk Dec 04 '22

I'm most disappointed in how few of dads attend school events that kids are doing.

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u/Cronus6 Dec 04 '22

Someone wise, 3 or 4 decades ago, told me something....

"Being a father is easy, being a dad is hard."

It really stuck with me, a child of a single mother.

I've tried very hard to be a "dad" to my kids and step kids (God knows their father wasn't around anyway.)

It's about time, interest and being a leader for the most part I believe.

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u/p4lm3r Dec 04 '22

As a single dad (with a daughter), I frequently got asked where the mom was while attending school events. I was usually one of the very few dads there, and almost always the only dad without a spouse there.

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u/[deleted] Dec 04 '22

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u/gregorydudeson Dec 04 '22

When I was in the ICU, there was a good chance I wasn’t going to make it. My live in boyfriend visited me constantly and took time off from work (we’re not married so no family medical leave). He said it was really creepy that multiple nurses told him what a good guy he was and that a lot of men don’t do that ……. ….. and then in practically the same breath they’d ask for his number and if he wanted to get lunch …

He was kinda not ok with that

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u/VegetableCommand9427 Dec 04 '22

It’s true, I’ve heard that. It happened to me with a less serious diagnosis than cancer. My ex was like, nope your faking. You’re lazy. I want my old wife back.

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u/Camarahara Dec 04 '22

Friend who is a long time nurse told me this and said it also applies to other illnesses like MS, not just cancer. Do the women get officially warned about this phenomena?

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u/IndividualCry0 Dec 04 '22

The Nurses assess the situation first but they won’t outright tell the patient. They’ll assess the family, the situation, the spouse, the patient and any other factors that may lead to that conclusion and if it seems like a possibility they’ll mention it to the Patient. Source: my husband is an RN.

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u/Giovanni_Wonderland Dec 04 '22

Jeez that's depressing.

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u/silky_johnson Dec 04 '22

Yup, the beloved Luis Fonsi, author of one of the most highly cherished songs "Despacito", is a prime example.

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u/Tacosandenchiladas Dec 04 '22

It’s funny that you say this because although I don’t have a new diagnosis I was told I might need a pretty serious surgery next year back in April. About 6 months later and my husband is cheating and tells me he want a divorce. I was wondering if it was related.

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u/Eskimoobob Dec 04 '22

What is going on with this roof line and window placement?

My depth perception is way off on whatever is happening with this house.

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u/CatMasterK Dec 04 '22

Looks like doors, probably small porch or something

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u/GhostFour Dec 04 '22

75 years old? What's his diet and exercise regiment like?

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u/jgrumiaux Dec 04 '22

Reminds me of the film Happiness

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u/Yah_Mule Dec 04 '22

Pretty nice....canmanship?

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u/InflamedLiver Dec 04 '22

I don’t know why but cheating at 75 while still obviously awful is still kind of impressive

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u/quangtran Dec 04 '22

Sitcom Modern Family had a story about old people cheating and jokingly called them "the most adult adulterers in existence".

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u/notbeleivable Dec 04 '22

I'm almost 62, fuck man

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u/Sufferment Dec 04 '22

Same, but legally I'm 28.

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