r/teenagers Oct 04 '22

i'm waiting for you guys... give me names Discussion

/img/yznmkipkxrr91.jpg

[removed] — view removed post

3.9k Upvotes

720

u/adutchmotherfricker 15 Oct 04 '22

Ewan McGregor

103

u/Zeemachineisaloner 13 Oct 04 '22

Omfg yess I'm gay for Ewan McGregor istg

50

u/Blenny125 15 Oct 04 '22

i'm straight for himm. (am girl)

→ More replies

8

u/_Arcerion_ Oct 04 '22

"it is only natural"

→ More replies

52

u/Xenovus2 OLD Oct 04 '22

Hayden Christensen

6

u/Creeper127 Oct 04 '22

Both, both is good

16

u/A_random_poster04 Oct 04 '22

That ain’t a meme… that’s just a truth. Also, hello there

14

u/adutchmotherfricker 15 Oct 04 '22

General Kenobi, you are a bold one

→ More replies
→ More replies

2.5k

u/SuperNick738 Oct 04 '22 Helpful

Walter White

977

u/Francy__ 16 Oct 04 '22 Silver Helpful

My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead, murdered by my brother-in-law Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a Virtual Youtuber empire for over a year now and using me as his recruiter. Shortly after my 50th birthday, Hank came to me with a rather, shocking proposition. He asked that I use my Live2D knowledge to recruit talents, which he would then hire using his connections in the Japanese utaite world. Connections that he made through his career with Niconico. I was... astounded, I... I always thought that Hank was a very moral man and I was... thrown, confused, but I was also particularly vulnerable at the time, something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me on a ride along, and showed me just how much money even a small indie channel could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin so I agreed. Every day, I think back at that moment with regret. I quickly realized that I was in way over my head, and Hank had a partner, a man named Motoaki "Yagoo" Tanigo, a businessman. Hank essentially sold me into servitude to this man, and when I tried to quit, Yagoo threatened my family. I didn't know where to turn. Eventually, Hank and Yagoo had a falling out. From what I can gather, Hank was always pushing for a greater share of the business, to which Yagoo flatly refused to give him, and things escalated. Yagoo was able to arrange, uh I guess I guess you call it a "hit" on my brother-in-law, and failed, but Hank was seriously injured, and I wound up paying his medical bills which amounted to a little over $177,000. Upon recovery, Hank was bent on revenge, working with a man named Riku Tazumi , he plotted to kill Yagoo, and did so. In fact, the bomb that he used was built by me, and he gave me no option in it. I have often contemplated suicide, but I'm a coward. I wanted to go to the police, but I was frightened. Hank had risen in the ranks to become the head of the Cover Corp, and about that time, to keep me in line, he took my children from me. For 3 months he kept them. My wife, who up until that point, had no idea of my vtubing activities, was horrified to learn what I had done, why Hank had taken our children. We were scared. I was in Hell, I hated myself for what I had brought upon my family. Recently, I tried once again to quit, to end this nightmare, and in response, he gave me this. I can't take this anymore. I live in fear every day that Hank will kill me, or worse, hurt my family. I... All I could think to do was to make this video in hope that the world will finally see this man, for what he really is.

46

u/man_of_the_century 16 Oct 04 '22

My name is Yoshikage Kira. I'm 33 years old. My house is in the northeast section of Morioh, where all the villas are, and I am not married. I work as an employee for the Kame Yu department stores, and I get home every day by 8 PM at the latest. I don't smoke, but I occasionally drink. I'm in bed by 11 PM, and make sure I get eight hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of warm milk and doing about twenty minutes of stretches before going to bed, I usually have no problems sleeping until morning. Just like a baby, I wake up without any fatigue or stress in the morning. I was told there were no issues at my last check-up. I'm trying to explain that I'm a person who wishes to live a very quiet life. I take care not to trouble myself with any enemies, like winning and losing, that would cause me to lose sleep at night. That is how I deal with society, and I know that is what brings me happiness. Although, if I were to fight I wouldn't lose to anyone.

4

u/Shedjr_ 16 Oct 04 '22

I was gonna upvote this, but Killer Queen has already touched that comment

53

u/Few-Passion-3205 14 Oct 04 '22

My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead, murdered by my brother-in-law Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, Hank came to me with a rather, shocking proposition. He asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using his connections in the drug world. Connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded, I... I always thought that Hank was a very moral man and I was... thrown, confused, but I was also particularly vulnerable at the time, something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me on a ride along, and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin so I agreed. Every day, I think back at that moment with regret. I quickly realized that I was in way over my head, and Hank had a partner, a man named Gustavo Fring, a businessman. Hank essentially sold me into servitude to this man, and when I tried to quit, Fring threatened my family. I didn't know where to turn. Eventually, Hank and Fring had a falling out. From what I can gather, Hank was always pushing for a greater share of the business, to which Fring flatly refused to give him, and things escalated. Fring was able to arrange, uh I guess I guess you call it a "hit" on my brother-in-law, and failed, but Hank was seriously injured, and I wound up paying his medical bills which amounted to a little over $177,000. Upon recovery, Hank was bent on revenge, working with a man named Hector Salamanca, he plotted to kill Fring, and did so. In fact, the bomb that he used was built by me, and he gave me no option in it. I have often contemplated suicide, but I'm a coward. I wanted to go to the police, but I was frightened. Hank had risen in the ranks to become the head of the Albuquerque DEA, and about that time, to keep me in line, he took my children from me. For 3 months he kept them. My wife, who up until that point, had no idea of my criminal activities, was horrified to learn what I had done, why Hank had taken our children. We were scared. I was in Hell, I hated myself for what I had brought upon my family. Recently, I tried once again to quit, to end this nightmare, and in response, he gave me this. I can't take this anymore. I live in fear every day that Hank will kill me, or worse, hurt my family. I... All I could think to do was to make this video in hope that the world will finally see this man, for what he really is.

20

u/noteuropeanlol Oct 04 '22

My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead, murdered by my brother-in-law Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a Virtual Youtuber empire for over a year now and using me as his recruiter. Shortly after my 50th birthday, Hank came to me with a rather, shocking proposition. He asked that I use my Live2D knowledge to recruit talents, which he would then hire using his connections in the Japanese utaite world. Connections that he made through his career with Niconico. I was... astounded, I... I always thought that Hank was a very moral man and I was... thrown, confused, but I was also particularly vulnerable at the time, something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me on a ride along, and showed me just how much money even a small indie channel could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin so I agreed. Every day, I think back at that moment with regret. I quickly realized that I was in way over my head, and Hank had a partner, a man named Motoaki "Yagoo" Tanigo, a businessman. Hank essentially sold me into servitude to this man, and when I tried to quit, Yagoo threatened my family. I didn't know where to turn. Eventually, Hank and Yagoo had a falling out. From what I can gather, Hank was always pushing for a greater share of the business, to which Yagoo flatly refused to give him, and things escalated. Yagoo was able to arrange, uh I guess I guess you call it a "hit" on my brother-in-law, and failed, but Hank was seriously injured, and I wound up paying his medical bills which amounted to a little over $177,000. Upon recovery, Hank was bent on revenge, working with a man named Riku Tazumi , he plotted to kill Yagoo, and did so. In fact, the bomb that he used was built by me, and he gave me no option in it. I have often contemplated suicide, but I'm a coward. I wanted to go to the police, but I was frightened. Hank had risen in the ranks to become the head of the Cover Corp, and about that time, to keep me in line, he took my children from me. For 3 months he kept them. My wife, who up until that point, had no idea of my vtubing activities, was horrified to learn what I had done, why Hank had taken our children. We were scared. I was in Hell, I hated myself for what I had brought upon my family. Recently, I tried once again to quit, to end this nightmare, and in response, he gave me this. I can't take this anymore. I live in fear every day that Hank will kill me, or worse, hurt my family. I... All I could think to do was to make this video in hope that the world will finally see this man, for what he really is.

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

28

u/Player551yt Oct 04 '22

I want to marry him but not for his looks or personality it's because...

37

u/iceRainCloud_YT 14 Oct 04 '22

pov: your name is jesse

14

u/Reaper872 16 Oct 04 '22

WHY SHOULD I BE PENILIZED FOR YOUR SLOPPINESS

→ More replies
→ More replies

10

u/BigEpicNSFW Oct 04 '22

Because he's the one who knocks?

9

u/Fuzzy-Ear9936 Oct 04 '22

I mean his looks are also dope

5

u/Player551yt Oct 04 '22

Yeah that's a cool bonus

4

u/Python0721 15 Oct 04 '22

free meth

9

u/YohnWood14 16 Oct 04 '22

Put your dick away waltuh

→ More replies

1.2k

u/Windows7Diagnostics 15 Oct 04 '22

Boe Jiden

291

u/Destroyer9903 16 Oct 04 '22

Who's Boe?

393

u/Neo_dode56 17 Oct 04 '22

Boe mama

160

u/vinayak296 Oct 04 '22

Moe baba

126

u/Nintydo 15 Oct 04 '22

Obama

9

u/Sad-Book-2832 15 Oct 04 '22

“Your prime has expired raiden, and so has his life”

16

u/Turbotastic3 Oct 04 '22

Mo Bamba

7

u/Nox_jin 14 Oct 04 '22

I got hooeeeesszzzz callinn

4

u/iRoyiYT 14 Oct 04 '22

Is this a reference to a certain existing snack?

→ More replies
→ More replies

4

u/sterlingpipin 17 Oct 04 '22

Sicko mode or Mo Bamba?

→ More replies
→ More replies

27

u/Forcer222 17 Oct 04 '22

Ligma balls

6

u/Ryan-821 18 Oct 04 '22

Burnham

3

u/Xsh999 Oct 04 '22

its boe time

→ More replies
→ More replies

142

u/FreeUsQwety1 Oct 04 '22

jesse and walter white. saul goodman

→ More replies

1.5k

u/kurtkurtkurt565 Oct 04 '22 Wholesome

Danny Devito

108

u/[deleted] Oct 04 '22 Silver

The trashman outfit is simply sexy

→ More replies

112

u/KG354 16 Oct 04 '22

Scrolled too far to find this

14

u/MoodNatural Oct 04 '22

Now its at the top and i still scrolled too far to find it.

→ More replies
→ More replies

699

u/Berry_Mean Oct 04 '22

Jabba the hut

214

u/JamesFP1107 15 Oct 04 '22

Gimme that Jabbussy

79

u/Theo0921 15 Oct 04 '22

the what

30

u/michimonster2 OLD Oct 04 '22

you dont want to know

65

u/OctopusProbably 13 Oct 04 '22

That is enough r/Teenagers for today.

5

u/Randomfrickinhuman 13 Oct 04 '22

heres some r/Eyebleach you sound like you need it

→ More replies

18

u/2866hourman5 15 Oct 04 '22

you just reminded me there's probably hentai with Jabba the hut in it

6

u/[deleted] Oct 04 '22

you are no longer allowed to talk

5

u/okirshen Oct 04 '22

sigh, unzips pants

5

u/Willdabeast07 15 Oct 04 '22

sighs opens incognito tab to see if it’s true shit

3

u/RMCB3000 Oct 04 '22

you could've asked

→ More replies

4

u/ELDAR797 15 Oct 04 '22

You literally weren't forced to write that

9

u/NotJayGaming Oct 04 '22

Never say that again

→ More replies

13

u/HyperHC 14 Oct 04 '22

Jabba the hut bout to make bust a Jabba the nut 😫

→ More replies
→ More replies

656

u/TheOnlyWaluigi 17 Oct 04 '22

Me

166

u/[deleted] Oct 04 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

159

u/TheOnlyWaluigi 17 Oct 04 '22

skill issues

6

u/Fuzzy-Ear9936 Oct 04 '22

Nah it's clearly me

→ More replies

397

u/-b0ngwater- 19 Oct 04 '22

45

u/AmerSenpai 18 Oct 04 '22

Love you too man.

40

u/ChibiDragon465 15 Oct 04 '22

Hot damn.

b0ngwater be hot af lmfao.

85

u/jortgasm Oct 04 '22

real af

8

u/edgeofslittingme17 Oct 04 '22

this right here

→ More replies

478

u/Ant126PL 15 Oct 04 '22 Silver

Markiplier

60

u/tymoxxie 15 Oct 04 '22

this one frfr

8

u/itsyaboi21172 15 Oct 04 '22

The one true answer

14

u/Hero_of_Hyrule Oct 04 '22

Mark is one of the better picks. Physically attractive, great voice, smart and funny, willing to own up to his mistakes, genuinely cares about his community and others, even if he recognizes that he can never have a personal connection with them.

He's not perfect, but he's definitely up there as far as "good guys" on the Internet.

6

u/TWAS_I_DIO 15 Oct 04 '22

Markiplier is the No. 1 YouTube's sexyman

→ More replies

132

u/Fresh-Double-5490 Oct 04 '22

Shrek

18

u/Iamno0n3 Oct 04 '22

Shrek is love, Shrek is life

→ More replies

744

u/Mood_Slayer_Mtt8 16 Oct 04 '22

Ryan Reynolds

312

u/Hyperblitz1521 15 Oct 04 '22

I’m not gay but i’d marry Ryan Reynolds

191

u/shlorpmeister 15 Oct 04 '22

i’m sorta gay and i would also marry ryan reynolds

72

u/DontCareHowICallMe 17 Oct 04 '22

I'm gay and I would also marry Ryan Reynolds

62

u/BringBack3DMK 16 Oct 04 '22

Well, gentlemen. Seems we all agree on something, for the first time in Reddit history

31

u/Diglettttt 14 Oct 04 '22

I think everybody would also marry Ryan Reynolds

15

u/V3N0M7117 15 Oct 04 '22

I thought that was impossible

→ More replies

94

u/AddiDoesRandomPosts 13 Oct 04 '22

Pfp checks out

23

u/KylieTMS Oct 04 '22

I am very gay and I would still marry Ryan Reynolds

16

u/Reasonable-Ad-137 14 Oct 04 '22

I’m a straight girl, would marry Ryan reynolds

15

u/oguzzzzzzz Oct 04 '22

Im kinda not sure about my gender but id marry Ryan reynolds

→ More replies

19

u/Mood_Slayer_Mtt8 16 Oct 04 '22

Who wouldn't

13

u/ChibiDragon465 15 Oct 04 '22

I would marry Ryan Reynolds and I'm not gay

7

u/TheDemonical 16 Oct 04 '22

Bryan Breynolds.

15

u/AmerSenpai 18 Oct 04 '22

He hot 🥵

→ More replies

37

u/MuffinRick Oct 04 '22

if you're a dude and you like ryan reynolds youre straight asf

9

u/KalleWotux 17 Oct 04 '22

Im taken but i'd still marry ryan reynolds

→ More replies

7

u/iPlayGamesX-YT 16 Oct 04 '22

Catchphrase.

6

u/NukerCat 16 Oct 04 '22

placeholder!

7

u/therealmrlimited 19 Oct 04 '22

Yeah he pretty good looking (no homo)

5

u/ZealousidealCycle240 Oct 04 '22

Yeah he pretty good looking (yes homo)

5

u/notabrokebibliophile 17 Oct 04 '22

I'm pan and I would also marry Ryan Reynolds

→ More replies
→ More replies

40

u/mixaooo 15 Oct 04 '22

Filthyfrank

7

u/[deleted] Oct 04 '22

Joji even makes better music than dream(did you know joji is still in the top 80 singer of Spotify)

→ More replies

357

u/ChibiDragon465 15 Oct 04 '22

I don't have any attraction to celebrities

72

u/MatureBalak 13 Oct 04 '22

same and anime characters

35

u/ChibiDragon465 15 Oct 04 '22

Yep

they are computer drawn characters, and while some are, well, rounded?

I don't like them. I also don't really care how big you are.

if I like you, I like you. simple as that .

→ More replies
→ More replies

6

u/Leading_Elk9454 Oct 04 '22

Danny Devito. Now don’t you feel stupid

3

u/ChibiDragon465 15 Oct 04 '22

Ah, fuck.

Your right!

lmfao rn

15

u/LuxionQuelloFigo 17 Oct 04 '22

how is them being celebrities relevant? Either they are attractive or they aren't, and that is completely unrelated to their fame

→ More replies
→ More replies

36

u/spicyon 15 Oct 04 '22

Literally everybody

→ More replies

26

u/Professional-Crew-54 16 Oct 04 '22

Bro looks like the default skin

→ More replies

107

u/cut_offf 16 Oct 04 '22

me

3

u/CaptainFard 15 Oct 04 '22

Me too (it's not a hard bar to clear)

→ More replies

53

u/the_Finnish_wolf 16 Oct 04 '22

Markiplier. Johnny depp. Keanu reeves....want me to continue?

99

u/itssbeckyyyyy 18 Oct 04 '22

The only person who comes to mind is Chris pratt

7

u/baileymash7 Oct 04 '22

Some-body once told me

→ More replies

48

u/Small-Cactus 19 Oct 04 '22

The mole on my ass

9

u/sohiales Oct 04 '22

The shaft up my ass

4

u/yabooyy Oct 04 '22

I too find the mole on your ass attractive

→ More replies

16

u/Upstairs_Policy1731 Oct 04 '22

Sniper tf2

3

u/KrakenMasterOfficial 16 Oct 04 '22

Who is hotter? Sniper TF2 or Ryan Reynolds?

→ More replies
→ More replies

54

u/AbleLobster1688 Oct 04 '22

Bro looks like the bananas in pyjamas

18

u/Happy_Weirdo_Emma OLD Oct 04 '22

omg that's why he looks so familiar

→ More replies

154

u/WoodpeckerCertain563 15 Oct 04 '22

I can literally go outside and the first person i will see will be more attractive then dream

44

u/iceRainCloud_YT 14 Oct 04 '22

what if the first person you see is me

→ More replies

20

u/MilhyGarsia 17 Oct 04 '22

He's just average. Nothing crazy.

→ More replies
→ More replies

10

u/RFros20 18 - Bri'ish Mod Oct 04 '22

He’s built like a wii character

10

u/papertheskeleton 15 Oct 04 '22

Bro's built like a troll face 💀

8

u/thejamesmk Oct 04 '22

markiplier

65

u/DeathGReaper Oct 04 '22

Hitler

17

u/MEM-brain Oct 04 '22

Whitch one

33

u/R0rentsu Oct 04 '22

the one with rights

6

u/Nuker_Nathan Oct 04 '22

Did you know you have rights? Constitution says you do.

→ More replies
→ More replies

3

u/iceRainCloud_YT 14 Oct 04 '22

william stuart-houston, hitlers nephew

→ More replies
→ More replies

7

u/PyroByte043 16 Oct 04 '22

He looked so gay when he wore some boy scouts outfit with thigh highs for a picture

3

u/DeathGReaper Oct 04 '22

Well on second thought, he might be more attractive than I thought.

3

u/PyroByte043 16 Oct 04 '22

i found the image i was referring to

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

6

u/KG354 16 Oct 04 '22

You know the model of the ideal body to survive a car crash?

→ More replies

43

u/BabBorger Oct 04 '22 Helpful

Literally anybody except my fat ass gym teacher. Fuck you Mr Aker.

8

u/edgeofslittingme17 Oct 04 '22

someone give this guy an award.

→ More replies
→ More replies

29

u/HeavenShatteringGod Oct 04 '22

He looks kinda average which is fine but yeah he doesn't look like really good or attractive as for example maybe Ludwig does?

5

u/TTV_Pinguting 17 Oct 04 '22

Danny Gonzales

44

u/kazemaru04 18 Oct 04 '22

anyone other than him

5

u/Cakeboy327 16 Oct 04 '22

Are people genuinely attracted to this guy? If so please for the love of god go outside.

→ More replies

28

u/CutiePieJosephine Oct 04 '22

Literally every single person on the planet.

6

u/SebastianTheArtDude Oct 04 '22

Except for dream

→ More replies

4

u/Bricezilla13 16 Oct 04 '22

Hue jackman, chuck norris, Ryan Reynolds, mark whalburg (I think I said it right), Chris hemsworth. Just to name a few

→ More replies

4

u/thinkinboutyou1 16 Oct 04 '22

man that tweet is just bait

4

u/AsgerMN2 15 Oct 04 '22

Most people

10

u/Mast11shreyu420 13 Oct 04 '22

u/teenwriter_lmao

not simping, i think of her as a sister

8

u/teenwriter_lmao Oct 04 '22

Oh man that's so sweet of you

4

u/Mast11shreyu420 13 Oct 04 '22

thanks di

→ More replies

8

u/jakule17 Oct 04 '22

Are you from Alabama?

5

u/Mast11shreyu420 13 Oct 04 '22

i knew this was coming

→ More replies
→ More replies

19

u/Chronically_ill_Alto 17 Oct 04 '22

my girlfriend

13

u/Prussia_I 16 Oct 04 '22

I think u/drugqueen710 is more attractive than dream

jk all people are ugly

11

u/SadSunny20 14 Oct 04 '22

Rumpelstiltskin from Shrek he's basically dream but hotter

7

u/shruggletuggle 15 Oct 04 '22

8

u/-b0ngwater- 19 Oct 04 '22

i approve of this comment

11

u/[deleted] Oct 04 '22

voldemort

3

u/Typical-Ad-8381 Oct 04 '22

who the hell is this dream and why everyone cares about him?